Author: admin

I had given my tutor an ultimatum on Mon.; no dick, no extension on his tutoring.

When I met him at the door on Thursday, he looked frazzled but when I snuck a look, his bulge seemed to be bulging more than usual.  In fact I could see the outline of his circumcised dick head against the soft worn fabric of his jeans.

This has to be a good sign I told myself.  My own dick head made a little push against the crotch of my Levis.  When I closed the door to my Dad’s office where we had our sessions, he told me to lock it.  I did and then he double checked it.  This dude seemed to be sweating bullets.  He leaned against the locked door and I faced him a few feet away.

I tilted my head, arched an eyebrow and said “well????”

“I talked to Tommy about this and he was shocked to say the least.  When I saw  the look on his face at first I thought I had made the right choice telling you to forget it, but he was shocked because I had never let a guy do that to me.  He gets a massage each day after practice and the normal routine is to end the massage with a blow job.  He calls it a ‘happy ending’.  And the equipment guy always sits in the back of the bus or the plane when we return from an away game and calms the players pent up testosterone by giving some of them a nice long blowjob.  The joke is that he handles the players ‘equipment’ better than he does the football equipment.”

He was clearly stalling.  “So what’s the bottom line?” I asked.  “BJ or no BJ?”

“BJ I guess.  What do I do?”  He looked completely discombobulated and very uneasy.

“For starters, let’s get your dick out of those tight pants.”  He was still leaning against the locked door so I moved over in front of him and stared into his eyes as I cupped and caressed that nice bulge.  When I rubbed his dick head, it started growing and was already leaving a wet spot of pre cum.  I undid the buttons slowly and then slid the jeans down a little.  His cock popped out and I looked down at it.  Nice!  Half hard, it hung out over his balls.  The head was leaking pre cum like crazy and a sticky drop of it was nestled in the hair on his balls.  I ran my finger across his piss hole, scooped up a nice pearl and looked back into his eyes as I stuck out my tongue to leisurely lick and then suck that bit of nectar off.  His eyes were wide and sort of unfocused  and they followed me down as I knelt and took the head of his cock in my mouth.  We maintained eye contact until I slid his dick head across my tongue.  Then he made a loud moan, threw his head back, slid down the door and spread his legs to give me perfect access.  He got really hard and pre cum was coating my tongue.  I pulled his Levis’ down a little more and his plump pair of balls popped out against my chin.  I took them in hand and massaged them as I swallowed his nice fat cock right down to his pubes.  His legs were shaking and his dick was really rock hard now.  I pulled back and wrapped my tongue around his dick head and sucked.  Then slowly taking it back to the hilt I tried to swallow it.  I was surprised when the shaft suddenly bucked and then shot a load of hot creamy cum against the back of my throat.  I swallowed by reflex but then another blast and another till my mouth was full and I felt some dribble out onto my chin.  I didn’t count how many shots he gave me but it was a lot for a first timer to take.  I’m proud to say I did really well and got every drop.  I continued to tongue him till it softened enough to have to let it go.  He seemed in deep shock.  His head was still thrown back and his breathing was loud and harsh.  His legs still trembled and even though his dick had softened, a small late drop of cum had oozed out and I leaned forward to lick it up.  I’m a greedy cunt!!  He finally settled down, did up his pants without saying a word.  He picked up his unopened back pack and started for the door.

“Sorry” his voice was high and strangled, “I don’t think I’m up to any math right now.  I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Good.  I’ll try to improve as we go along.  Also I’ll do some math.  And thanks for letting me practice on you.”

He looked back over his shoulder as he opened the door.  “Are you fucking kidding me?  I can’t tell you what you’ve opened up for me.  I can’t wait for Monday and I can’t wait to tell Tom all about it!!”

And so I had sucked my first cock and swallowed my first cum.  A LOT of cum.  But sucking cock wasn’t all I had in mind and I eagerly looked forward to years of new experiences.  Thanks for going down memory lane with me.  Can we do it again?

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I told my friend, I was surprised that he swallowed his brother’s load of cum. And he told me he was lost in the moment and wanted to have the essence of his brother, no matter how it tasted. He said after the first spurt which filled his mouth he found it had a strong taste but after swallowing the first mouthful, his mouth was filled again at least six times. He said while he was busy swallowing he had begun to fill his brother’s mouth with his. He said it was the first time he reached orgasm having his cock sucked. He said he always ended up masturbating til he came finally letting the cocksucker take his spurting  cock within his lips. My friend said it was such an intense orgasm that he remained hard within his brother’s lips as well did his brother. He said they continued sucking each other’s cocks and both ended up coming again.

My friend said that is why his brother had left so quickly without letting you suck him off. He said his brother didn’t have anymore cum in his balls because he had given it all to him. I told him it was alright and that there would be other opportunities. My friend said next time he would let me suck his brother off first and then let his brother fuck his ass. He said he had to have this huge cock up his ass no matter what.

I didn’t realize it would be the next day after his brother finished working that he showed up again. This time, I joined them upstairs so I wouldn’t miss out. His brother asked whether he could shower first so I got him a towel  and he showered and came in the room with the towel wrapped around his waist. I could already tell he was hard because the towel tented outward. He dropped the towel exposing his tremendous cock and said who wants this first. My friend and I got naked  and I told my friend let’s suck his cock together.

We both got on our knees in front of his brother who was sitting on the edge of the bed. I let his brother start sucking his cock while I lapped his low hanging balls, savoring the musky taste that only black guys possess. We alternated sucking his brother’s cock til  my friend stood up and brought his hard cock to where his brother could capture it within his lips. I was left sucking his cock alone all the while watching his brother feeding on my friend’s cock.

I could tell both were getting close because I could feel his brother’s legs start to tremble and my friend’s legs had started to tremble at the same time also. All at once my friend shouted that he was going to shoot  and grabbed his brother’s head and forced his entire cock down his brother’s throat and let loose a torrent of cum which his brother eagerly swallowed. Shortly, my mouth was be inundated with his brother’s load of ball juice and I swallowed as fast as I could.

After both had finished shooting their loads I told them I needed to come. I laid between them on the bed while my friend sucked my balls while his brother chewed on my teats which brought me to an enormous release of cum on my chest.

Both had gotten hard again and I knew what was going to happen. My friend said he wanted to fuck my ass while his brother fucked him. I got lubed up and my friend brought the head of his cock to my rosebud and entered til his balls smacked against my ass. Next was my friend’s turn to be impaled by his brother and I was surprised he had taken it so easily to the hilt My friend started to fuck me while his brother was fucking him. After five minutes of moaning and groaning I could feel my friend’s cock begin to thicken  until I felt him shooting his seed in my ass. His brother continued to fuck him and let loose with a growl and emptied his balls into his brother. All three of us were exhausted and all three of us fell asleep thoroughly satiated.

My face pushed into my pillow made it difficult to breathe. He was sitting on my back. I couldn’t force him off. I bent my legs at the knees and tried to kick him with my heals, but they didn’t reach. The shock of cold liquid running between my cheeks made my body shudder. The pressure changed as he moved, but he was still able to keep me pinned to the bed, not surprising since he weighed about a hundred pounds more than I did.

“Fuck,” I screamed into the pillow as he penetrated me. I could hear him grunt in pleasure. He pushed my knees apart with his. His hands gripped my shoulders.

The room seemed to change, and I heard him growl. “You fucking piece of shit. You think you can parade around in your underpants with your ass hanging out. You wiggle your fucking hardon in front of me, giving me a boner, and then you pretend you don’t want it.” He slapped the side of my head. He kept fucking. I felt lucky that he wasn’t very thick. My last boyfriend was bigger, so he wasn’t tearing my ass, but he was relentless. It seemed to take forever before he came.

He got up from the bed and picked me up as though I were made from straw. He slapped me across the face, hard. “Tell your father, you fucking tease, and you’ll be out of your ear. Now go shower and wash your ass. I might want to use it again, and it better be clean.

I took a shower and threw the bedspread into the washer. I wanted nothing to remind me of him.

The next morning, my father sat at the table as he had a little breakfast before heading off to bed. I told him how his latest boyfriend used me, filled me with his filthy DNA. And when I was done, my dad looked toward the doorway. I turned, and there stood Roger with a smug look.

“What do you have to say about this?” he asked.

Roger shook his head. “I told you that the kid was after me. He said if I didn’t fuck him, he would tell you that I did anyway. It never happened, the kid’s a liar.”

My father looked at me. “Look at me,” he demanded.

“He’s the liar, dad.”

“Stephen, he’s been telling me for the past week how you’ve been after him. I can’t blame you, he is a hunk. And I’m sure that we haven’t been as quiet as we should have been. But when men fuck, there’s bound to be some noise. Anyway, you’re going to have to go back to your mother. I can’t have you going after my boyfriend.”

“But Dad, he’s lying.”

“That’s enough. Pack your shit. Roger will take you to the bus station.”

Sometimes, when one looks back at the past, he realizes that something horrible, possibly even brutal, ends up being the catalyst for the change his life needs.

My mother wasn’t happy about my showing up. I’d had a part-time job; now, I had to find another. My dad had taught me to weld, but I had no license, so I set about to get one. Based on my father’s instruction, I was able to pass the test to get the certification. He was a mostly worthless father, but he did give me a career.

I found work almost immediately, and within a few months, I had my own place, a small one-bedroom apartment. My mother gave me furniture, probably so she had an excuse to buy new ones. I was able to get a decent used car and to work on my savings. Life was good, but I was lonely. I started using Grindr for companionship. I met lots of men; no one worked out. I didn’t want any sex until I knew the guy was decent. That attitude greatly diminished my opportunities while improving the grip of my right hand.

One thing that my apartment didn’t have was its own washer and dryer. I had been using my mother’s machines until the day she insinuated that I only came to visit to wash my clothes. While I told her I would come to visit her regardless, she told me to use a laundromat and to stop bothering her.

Thus began my weekly trip to Speed-o-Wash. It was the cleanest that I’d found. I would go on Friday morning since my job was four ten-hour days, I had Fridays off. I chatted with the people I would meet there every wash day. 

After a few months, I had the opportunity to move into a small house on a nice sized lot.  It still didn’t have a washer or dryer; although, there was a place for one.  I kept going to the Speed-o-Wash.  My life was pretty routine until the Friday morning I slipped on a banana peel. I’d put a banana in my cereal, and left the peel on the counter. I must have knocked it onto the floor, and when I slipped, I broke my bowl and fell on it. Six staples at the local doc-in-the-box got me back on track, but I ended up at the laundry three hours behind schedule.

No one was in the place when I got there, so I got my things going. I always used three machines, whites, underwear, and everything else. My things had just started washing when a man my age came in with two baskets and a baby.

“Wow, do you need some help? How are you carrying those baskets and the baby? Aww. He’s cute.” He was cute, and so was his baby.

“Thanks for the offer. The baby’s in this sling thing. His name is Liam.”

“How do you do, Liam? I’m Will.”

“I’m Drew.”

“Pleased to meet you. Are you sure I can’t help you with anything? My clothes are already in the machines.”

“Well, I do have another load in the car, in the front seat.” He put the baskets down and pulled out his key fob. “Will you lock it back?”

“Not a problem.” I headed out to his car which was easy to find since it was the only other one in the lot. I grabbed the blue Ikea filled with laundry and locked the car before heading back in. I placed it on top of the washer next to the one Drew was filling with white towels.

“How old is he?” I asked. I’m sure he’s asked that question all the time.

“Ten months.”

Liam turned and looked at me. He knew we were talking about him.

“He knows I was asking about him. Don’t you Liam?”

Liam squirmed some more and put his hands out to me.

“Hey,” said Drew. “He never does that. He must like you.”

“May I hold him?”

“Yeah, you’re not a kidnapper, right.”

“Nope,” I replied.

“Good, I don’t have any money to pay a ransom.“ He freed Liam from the sling and handed him to me. Liam grabbed onto my shirt and rested his head against my chest. I moved side to side as I held him while Drew finished loading the washers.

“Let me know when you’re tired of holding him.”

“How could you ever get tired of holding him?” I asked.

“He can get cranky at times, but he’s a great kid. I think he’s pretty smart which is a lot more than I can say for his parents.”

“So you’re not his father?”

“Not biologically. Hey, let’s sit down.

We sat. “So you’re babysitting?” I asked.

“No. He’s mine now.”

Liam’s grip on my shirt seemed to tighten slightly as he wiggled around to get comfortable. It felt really good to hold him. There was a story here, but I didn’t pry. Drew eyed me carefully. “You want to know the story, but you’re too polite to ask,” he said.

“Yeah, you’ve read me correctly.” I smiled. Liam’s eyes closed and his breathing became regular.

“It’s not really very interesting.”

“Yeah?” I whispered. “I think it’s already put Liam to sleep.” I smiled. “I don’t want to pry.”

“Most people do,” replied Drew. “That fact that you don’t makes me want to tell you. The way you’re holding him and the way he went to you make me think you’ll understand.”

Liam moved his hand just slightly. I wanted to be friends with the man sitting next to me. Was it because of the baby that I was holding, or was it because he seemed so nice and friendly?

“My sister gave birth to him. She’s always slept around, but she’s always made her boyfriends use protection. My mother drilled it into us. My sister and I have different fathers and were born when my mother was still a teenager. My sister’s father accepted her, but he went to prison when she was little. The man whom my mother claimed was my father insisted on a paternity test. He wasn’t my father. So I don’t know my dad, and my dad doesn’t know I exist.

“So, anyway, my mother always insisted we use protection. We got the talk when we were ten. But, you know, protection isn’t one hundred percent. Before he was born, I heard my sister saying that she was going to leave him at the fire station, and she was going to go to California with her boyfriend. I convinced her to give him to me. She listed me as the father and gave a fake name for herself.”

I reached my hand out and touched his. He looked up at me. “It’s the stuff of soap operas, isn’t it.”

“What you did is really beautiful.” I could tell my eyes were moist.

“Things are tough. I thought my mom would help me a little, but she wants nothing to do with us. There’s a daycare on campus, and I’ve been able to get some financial aid to help us until I graduate and can get regular work.”

“I admire what you’re doing.” In my head, the gears started spinning. If I got a washer and dryer for my apartment, he could do his laundry there. I could spend laundry day with a friend, and Liam would have a clean place to play while we worked. My first washer stopped. I looked over at it.

“Want to hand him back?”

“No. I love holding him.” I looked down at him. “Liam,” I whispered. “Time to go back to your daddy.”

Drew took him, and I set about moving my clothes to the dryer. “So, how do you manage when no one is here?”

“He sits in the laundry basket. I don’t want him crawling around on the floor, you know.”

“Yeah, I know. Sometimes I don’t like walking on the floor even in shoes. And this is the cleanest place I’ve found.”

We kept talking. We folded our clothes, exchanged phone numbers, and I helped him get his things in the car. As we said good-bye, I said, “I’m planning on going to the park near the airport on Sunday afternoon. Do you think Liam would like to watch the planes?”

“Are you asking Liam out on a date?”

“Yeah, I am. I think we got along pretty well. We’ll make it a picnic. I’ll bring my camera in case he wants to take some shots of the airplanes. I’ll even provide the food. I am the one asking him out after all. Maybe you’d like to join him. It’s fun watching the planes.”

Drew bent down into the car. “What do you think Liam? Will wants to know if you want to go to a grown-up airplane park. Yeah?” He stood up in front of me. “He says it sounds like fun.”

“I’ll pick you up on Sunday.” I had the sudden urge to kiss Drew, but I resisted. “Is eleven-thirty too early?”

“Why not eleven? I’d like… I mean, I’m sure Liam would like to have an extra bit of time with you.”

I smiled. “I like you. You’re a special man.” I placed my thumb in the palm of his hand and rubbed. “Can I face-time you later?”

“I’d be sad if you don’t.” He got into the car. I pushed the door shut.

“Good-bye, Liam,” I called into the car. Then I turned and walked back to my car. I watched them drive away. I headed straight to Best Buy to get a washer and dryer. They were able to deliver one on Friday morning.

That night, I felt like a teenager as I started texting Drew.

Me: I had a great time talking to you today, and I enjoyed holding Liam. He’s really sweet. I can see where he gets it.

Drew: I had a good time, too. I haven’t met someone like you before.

Me: Is Drew your real name?

Drew: It’s Andrew, but everyone’s always called me Drew.

Me: Do you prefer Drew, Andrew, or … Andy?

Drew: No one has ever called me Andy.

Me: Should I start?

Drew: It’d be wild to have a friend who called me a different name from what everyone else calls me.

Me: So, Andy, I take it that you’d like it.

Drew: I think I’d like anything that you’d do.

Me: Yeah?

Drew: Duck, I wrote that without thinking.

Me: I think you’re special.

Three minutes passed without a reply. My heart was in my stomach.

Drew: Sorry about that. Liam dropped something, and I heard it and had to investigate. He’s fine. I want you to know that I think you’re a special guy, too. I haven’t had luck with guys I’ve dated.

Me: I want to know if we’ll be good friends or something more.

Drew: I don’t want a friend with benefits.

Me: I’m not talking about that.

Drew: Sorry, didn’t mean to say you were; just saying it.

Me: I don’t want that either. I’m looking for someone to love who loves me. A real relationship.

Drew: That’s what I want, too. Will you call me Andy?

Me: Yes, Andy, I will.

Drew: Can we meet tomorrow? I don’t want to wait until Sunday.

Me: I’m here all day. Want me to come over, or do you want to come here?

Drew: Embarrassed about my place; I’ll come over.

Me: No need to be. But you are welcome here. Sending you my address.

Drew: got it. Hold on.

Another three minutes.

Drew: Sorry. Neighbors are fighting; they woke up Liam.

Me: Poor baby. Do you want to come over now? No neighbors. No noise.

Drew: How do you not have neighbors?

Me: I have a large lot with a small house.

Drew: That must be nice.

Me: Come over and see. Bring a change of clothes and spend the night. I have a spare room with a twin bed. Or Liam can sleep between us on the queen bed.

Drew: The police just showed up. I think I will come over. See you when I get there.

I reread those words several times. Each time I read them, my manhood grew. I couldn’t contain my excitement. Then I freaked. I hadn’t put all the groceries away. My laundry was still out. I ran around the house like a madman getting everything in order. I did a once-over on the living room and adjusted some books on the shelf. “You’re a crazy gay man,” I said aloud. “He’s not going to notice a book that’s pushed in five millimeters more than the others.” But that didn’t stop me from going over everything with a fine-toothed comb. I even put fresh sheets on the twin bed even though no one had slept on the sheets that were on it.

I was running the vacuum over the living room rug one last time when I saw the car pull up. I went outdoors and signaled him to park under the carport. I hated that thing. It was going to be the first thing I took down when I bought the place, but it had proven useful during the last storm when a pizza delivery guy was stuck here during the hailstorm. It was too bad he was straight.

“I know it looks as if I’m moving in,” said Andy, “but when you’ve got a baby, there’s a lot of stuff.”

“Hey, it’s cool.”

“Covered parking for your guests; that’s cool.”

“I put it up when you texted that you were coming,” I joked.

“Thanks so much for letting me come. The last time the police came, they had to come three more times. They just wouldn’t stop.”

“Let me help you get this stuff inside. Oh. Look who’s there.”

Liam put his arms out. “Me. Hold.”

My mouth dropped. “What the fuck! Did he just tell me to hold him?”

“Yep. I’m surprised he didn’t say anything this afternoon, but maybe he was assessing you.” Andy laughed.

“Oh, you know I’m going to hold you if you ask me to.” I took him from the car seat and held him. “Sorry, dad, you’re going to have to unload and bring into the house on your own. My boyfriend wants me to hold him.” I danced around a little bit. Liam giggled, and I had a great time just showing my awful dance moves. When Andy took the last bag into the house, I followed him and latched the door.

Two large bags, a playpen, and a cooler filled the alcove next to the kitchen. “Things for the fridge first?” I asked. “I’ll move the bags into the hall.” I didn’t want to move them into the bedroom unless asked. “I was going to call in a pizza, but I wasn’t sure what kind you wanted,” I said as I moved the bags.

“I like anything except green olives and peppers.”

“You’re my kind of man.” I called the pizza in. Liam waited patiently, and as soon as I hung up the phone, he said, “Me. Dow.”

“He should probably go in the playpen,” said Andy.

“No,” said Liam. “Flo.”

“The floor is clean if you’re worried about it. I’m kind of neurotic about it.”

“OK, Liam,” Andy said directly to him. “But stay where I can see you.”

I put Liam down, and he immediately grabbed my leg and pulled himself up. He was wobbly, but I was impressed.

Andy looked at me. “He’s been trying to stand for about a week. I worry that he’ll fall and get hurt, but I’m probably being overprotective. I’m sure my mother just turned me loose, and I survived.”

“Has he tried to walk?” I asked.

“Only when I hold both his hands. He tried to coordinate his legs.”

I bent forward and put my fingers out to see if he would grab them. He let go of my leg to grab one of my fingers, and then he laughed and sat down. He crawled away and sat on the edge of the rug in the living room before turning to face us. “Come.”

“I can see who’s in charge already.”

“You’re the one giving in,” Andy reminded me.

We both walked over and sat next to him. He reached up to Andy’s shirt and pulled himself up to give Andy a kiss.

“Whoa,” I laughed. Then he reached over to me, grabbed my shirt, and kissed me. I smiled and laughed, but inside, I was fighting back tears. I’d fallen in love with this kid. He was giggling.

I looked up at Andy, and he said, “My turn.” He leaned in and gently kissed me.

Liam let go and sat down. He squealed and clapped his hands.

“I know I’m supposed to wait until the end of our first day, but I couldn’t resist.”

“I don’t want you to resist. Ever. I have a surprise for you.”

“For me?”

“Yeah. Well, sort of. I didn’t like thinking about you and Liam at the laundromat, and I’d been thinking about getting a washer and dryer, so after we left the laundromat, I ordered a pair. They’ll be here Friday. There’s a laundry room right next to the kitchen, so they’ll go in there. It’ll take longer because there’s only one of each of course, but you can still go to the other place if you want.”

“You’re rambling; just shut the fuck up and let me thank you.” He kissed me again.

Liam grabbed my shirt again and pulled himself back up. He kissed me again.

“We need to get you some toys or a baby brother.” I laughed.

“Where would we find a baby brother?” Andy asked Liam. Liam just laughed and crawled to the couch.

The gears in my head started to turn. I’d heard that two of the guys on the construction team had gotten girlfriends pregnant within the last year. I wondered whether any wanted to give their children up for adoption. An unwed mother who would let me put my name on the birth certificate and use a fake name for herself. Would that work for me as well?

We heard a car in the driveway. Andy stood up. “Pizza.”

“Peez-ah,” echoed Liam.

I stood up. “Can he eat pizza? Doesn’t it need to be put in the blender?” I went to the door.

“I’ve given him a tiny piece that I cut from the end, and he’s happy. I never thought about making it a purée.”

I opened the door to see the sexy boy who’d delivered the pizza the last time. “How are you?” I asked.

“OK. You’ve got company this time.”

“Yeah.” I handed him a ten in exchange for the two boxes.

“Too bad, but thanks.” He turned and left. I was sure he was strutting his ass. His attitude gave me the urge to follow him out to the car, push him against it, and fuck him hard. He was a fucking tease. The last time he’d delivered pizza, he touched my chest with his finger and said, “Too bad I have other pizzas to deliver.” Someone was going to take him down a peg one day. Not me though. I had something immensely better inside. A fifteen-minute fuck versus a lifetime of happiness, or at least the possibility of it. It was an easy choice. I closed the door and put the boxes on the kitchen table.

A few hours later, Andy and I were sitting on the couch holding hands; we were no longer hungry. Liam sat at my feet. Classical music played. I felt a tug, and Liam was looking at me. “Di-pah.”

Andy smiled. “I’ll take care of it.”

“No,” said Liam. “Wi-oh.”

“My name is Will. You couldn’t possibly want me to change your diaper.”

“Di-pah,” he repeated.

I leaned forward and lifted him. “Every job has its shitty part. Should we take care of it in the bathroom? Then you can have a bath.”

“I’ll bring what we need.”

Changing Liam was not as awful as I had imagined. It was pretty easy to wipe his little ass clean. Once the tub water was warm, the two of us washed him and rinsed him. We shared a few more kisses while he splashed in the water. He smelled really nice as I dried him off. He got a new diaper, and I put him in the playpen. The classic music was still playing, I turned the volume down and turned off the lights. He was asleep in minutes.

Andy turned to me and put his arms around my neck. “I’ve never felt more comfortable around another person. Almost from the instant I met you, you put me at ease, and I felt that I could trust you.” He kissed me; it wasn’t hard and rushed. It was gentle and caring. His tongue caressed my lips and rubbed against my tongue.

My groin responded, and I pushed against him. “Why don’t we shower? Then we can do whatever you’re comfortable with.”

“There are things I want, Will, that…”

“It’s OK, Andy. Nothing you’re uncomfortable with. We’re not here to prove anything. Just to get to know each other.”

Andy smiled. “Can you scrub my back?”

“I’d love to scrub your back.”

I noticed a slight tenseness overtake him.

“Talk to me. Tell me what you’re thinking, what you’re feeling.”

“I’m a little nervous. I haven’t been naked in front of anyone, another guy, and…” He looked at me, and then he stepped away. “I felt you when we were kissing, you know, your…”

“You felt my erection,” I said.

“Yeah. I’m not that big. I don’t want to disappoint you.”

“Oh, Andy.” I put my arms on him. “You’ve exceeded every expectation I’ve ever had about someone I’d want to share my life with. I’m not sure how to put how good I’m feeling into words. I’m not worried about the size of your dick.”

“You haven’t seen it.”

“Show it to me.” It was a demand; I could have been more gentle, but fuck, Andy was the perfect man, and I was going to be too shallow to accept his small dick. “Take off all your clothes.”

He obeyed as if he were a young child in trouble.

His athletic runner body came into view. He was on the thin side, but he wasn’t lacking any muscle. He had great six-pack abs. His chest was covered in short, straight blond hair. Just looking at him made my dick pulse. I got down on my knees, and as I did, I ran my fingers over his chest. His cock sprang to life. He had a good five and one-half inches of stiff, straight dick. His shaft was probably on the thinner size of average, but, like Andy, his cock was perfect.

“There is nothing wrong with this penis,” I told him, and then I slid my mouth over it. It reached to the back of my mouth and perhaps a little farther. I began to suck him, running my tongue up and down the shaft as I kept my nose buried in his bush. I wrapped my fingers around his cheeks and held him tight to my face.

With my lips circled around his cock, I moved my mouth up and down. I felt Andy’s hands grab my head. He started to pump; he was skull-fucking me. I heard him grunting, and then he slammed into me. The head of his dick went into my throat. He emitted a long ‘fuuuck’ through clenched teeth as I felt his seed spasmed into my gullet.

Andy let go of me and sat on the floor. He was out of breath. I noticed some cum drip from his cock, which was still completely rigid. He looked at me in disbelief.

I moved closer to him on my hands and knees. I licked the end of his erection and then looked him directly in the eyes. “That is one helluva dick. There is nothing wrong with that baby. I can’t wait until you fuck me with it.”

I saw an evil grin form on his face.

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Training Day

“I’m ready” I called out from the bathroom, stepping into my new jockstrap and sliding a lubed finger into the hole still recovering from he pounding Angelo had given it the night before. “Come in baby, let’s see you” he called from the living room. I walked into the living room wearing what he’d bought for me earlier that day; a new jockstrap and some leg warmers. I’d freshly shaved my face, washed myself and freshened up, making sure I was clean as a whistle. I shyly walked into the living room hovering in the doorway as Angelo looked over my slim 22 year old body. Angelo was sat comfortable on the leather couch he’d fucked me on last night, his muscular arms resting on the back of it. He was smoking a spliff, a thick saggy one which smelled like it was straight green. “I know you want some” he said, his very mild Italian accent peeking through as he offered me the joint. I sat down next to his hulking frame which was wrapped in a deep charcoal dressing gown and a pair of Calvin Klein boxer briefs. The elastic perfectly tracing the outline of his cock, an extraordinary specimen even when flaccid. We smoked the joint till we were nicely stoned and he turned around to me saying “Well now I’ve gotten to know you Baby, I think its about time you learned more about this role I’ve got on offer.” We had spoken about his need for a houseboy at the bar before he’d throat fucked me last night and I had expressed an interest, seeing as it’d allow me to become this Italian stud’s live in fuck toy. This morning I was even more eager to do the job, the fucking he had given me was one of the greatest I’d ever received and I hadn’t yet forgotten the taste of his cock. “What do you need me to do Angelo?” I asked him, my cock stirred to life by the joint we’d smoked before. “Well baby, I need you to help service Daddy whenever he wishes. I’m sure you can attend to that.I also need you to be happy to help out a little when I have friends around, make conversation and entertain them,” Angelo said, staring out the window as he puffed on the joint. “I’ll also need you to clean up around the house a little bit, so that Daddy’s place is nice and clean” he added, looking into my eyes. “I can do that sir, you just let me know where I can start.” I chirped, eager to please the demigod I had managed to find and shifting my hand to his crotch. “You’re an attentive boy Sebastien,” Angelo chuckled as he lifted my hand off his cock “but this morning I need to learn more about you if you’re to be the new houseboy here.” He stood up and walked over to a cabinet on the walls. “Close your eyes now” he said as I closed them, listening to the sound of him rummaging through the cabinets. A few moments later I opened my eyes as instructed. Laid out before me on on his glass coffee table were a selection of dildos, butt plugs and anal toys. “If you’re gonna be the new house boy Sebastien, I need to get you ready,” Angelo said and he folded his cock gently. “Yes Daddy,” I replied as the blood rushed to my cock, forcing it against my jockstrap.

For the remainder of the day I was either lying on my back as Angelo fucked my throat, or laid over his cock so he could toy my ass. He’d lay me over his lap as he slowly worked his collection of toys into me. “You’re my House Boy now Sebastien,” Angelo said, pushing a clear dildo into my slit. “You’re be here to attend to my every need,” he went on, gently massaging the silicone shaft deeper into my hole. “Yes Daddy,” I cooed, the dildo in my ass was building up a nice rhythm and my hole singing with joy. After being fucked so thoroughly last night my once tight boy pussy had turned into a malleable fuck hole. It was heavenly; there I was, stoned, slutty and young, with a daddy like Angelo fucking – something I’d dreamed about for years. His thick Italian tool and his hot body were like something out of a porno, and then there’s way he fucked me… After he had worked my ass for ten or so minutes Angelo pushed the dildo deep into me. “Ow! Daddy! It hurts!” I cried, wincing with the pain as the thick dildo fucked my guts. Angelo slapped my ass hard, the crisp smack of his palm on my exposed ass echoing around the room. “You’ll take it, I’m just getting started,” said Angelo in his assertive daddy tone. I could see he was enjoying himself, his eyes affixed to my hole as it clung to the thick silicone penetrating my cunt, his member gorged with blood in his Calvins. I whimpered as Angelo spanked me again, “Harder please” I begged, longing for his firm controlling hand. Angelo obliged and spanked me a few times more.

“Such a good boy aren’t you, Sebastien? You love it when daddy fucks your little boy hole and spanks your ass?” Angelo whispered in my ear, his warm breath on my neck driving me crazy. “I need some relief, fucking your ass is tiresome work,” he said pulling his cock from his drawers. “On the floor.” he continued, stopping me before I could get close to tasting my Daddy’s meat. Daddy took the dildo from my ass, leaving it sad and empty. I longed for the fulfilment of the fullness I had lived with for the last 20 minutes had given me. Angelo reached to the table over me, his cock dangling inches from my mouth, mocking me with its virility. “Now I want you to sit on this,” he said, producing a butt plug bigger than I’d ever seen before. “I-I-I-I don’t think I can take it sir,” I said, intimidated by the silicone mass in front of me. “Oh yes you can baby, try this,” Angelo said, passing me some poppers. I’d never done poppers before, I knew a few guys who did but they were mostly into anon hookups and group breeding sessions, something which I’d never been involved in. “Are you sure sir?” I asked, an obedient slut for my new Daddy. “Of course baby, now have your poppers and stretch that pussy open for daddy.” Angelo replied, his voice taking on tone it had when dominated me the night before. I took a couple of deep whiffs of the poppers and felt them instantly. I was woozy and a little horny, and my ass felt amazing. “Fill my pussy up boy,” Angelo continued, as he took the poppers out of my hand. “Yes daddy,” I replied as my ass relaxed. Angelo had lubed the mammoth pluf, but my ass had been lubed and worked enough over the last 24 hours that I didn’t need it. I slowly sat on the plug, feeling its tip expanding in my ass. Streaks of pain shot up as I sat down, I moaned and my cock jumped with every inch my ass consumed. Angelo looked proud as he was laid back in his rich leather couch, his robe splayed, his hard cock rising from his Calvins. “What a good boy,” he murmured, his strong eyes looking down upon his new House Boy as he took one of Daddy’s toys with ease. The plug had filled me up more than ever before. I was bigger than Angelo’s dick but still didn’t compare. Afterall, how could a lump of silicone compare to my new Daddy dick which promised to deliver me load after load?

Watching his new boy toy eagerly take his biggest butt plug clearly pleased Angelo, and he made it known. His strong hand reached down and patted me on the head before he kissed me deeply. “I’m so happy I found you Sebastien,” he whispered before kissing me deeply again. “Thank You sir” I replied, my heart fluttering as he kissed me. “Please may I suck your cock sir?” I asked, my voracious appetite growing each second his cock was visible. Angelo didn’t say anything and lent back, letting out a leisurely “Ahhh” as he got comfortable. He flicked on the TV and put on some porno as I began to suck on his cock. I loved sucking on Angelo’s manhood, slowly working each inch of the glorious package, it was my labour of love. “Mmmm boy you sure are good at sucking daddy’s dick” Angelo moaned, he took his phone out and took a photo of me. “That’s just for a few friends of mine, don’t worry” he continued, making sure to get both the plug and his cock in frame as I swallowed his inches. I didn’t think about the photo; I was here to serve Angelo. I kept sucking on his cock, pumping the shaft and massaging his balls. Angelo’s meat tasted so good, it’s deep salty musk drove me crazy. Angelo put his hand on the back of my head and I knew that he wanted to fuck my throat so I opened myself up and received him. He didn’t throat fuck me quite like he had last night, it was slower and more deliberate, he knew he didn’t have to rush so he took his time milking himself with me. Slowly he guided my head up and down his shaft, his pelvis gently thrusting as my tongue touched his balls. “Good boy,” He moaned again, his eyes moving from the TV to me as I absorbed him. “I’m such a lucky Daddy to have a boy who will swallow my cock like you do” he continued, his words and husky voice fuelling my hunger. “I love your cock Daddy, I want to drain it everyday.” I told him, the taste of his premium on my lips. “Good, good, now stand up for me boy” he responded. I sent his package to the back of my throat one last time before I stood up. “Turn around” he commanded, so I did, baring my plugged ass to him as I bent over the coffee table. Angelo spanked me a few more times, my ass jiggling with the plug before he slowly pulled it out. “Sit down now,” he went on, “gently, I’ll guide you.” I complied, feeling my hole filled once again. Angelo grunted with approval as my ass swallowed his cock snd my twink butt cheeks splayed out on his lap. I moaned in ecstasy as I felt his length swelling inside me. “Mmm does my baby boy like that?” Angelo asked, his strong hands feeling my thin frame. “Yes sir,” I replied, realising than just how addicted to his cock I had become. “Ride it” Angelo commanded, peppering me with another spank for good measure, eliciting a deep moan from me.

I rode his cock as instructed; slowly, bouncing on the tip and slowly taking his entirety as he laid back on the enjoying the view. “I love seeing that pussy stretched out on my dick” he moaned, encouraging me to ride him faster with another firm spank. As I rode my new Daddy’s cock I looked at the TV, watching the porn that Angelo had been watching. It was a vintage porno featuring a man with a cock the size of Daddy’s! He was muscly and tall with plenty of blonde hair, I’d love to be sandwiched between him and Angelo. “You like watching my porno as you ride me huh?” chuckled Angelo, noticing the boy on his cock was absorbed in the TV. “Yes sir,” I replied obediently. Angelo fast forwarded the tape to a scene with some action. The hunk was now fucking two Asian girls, their pale skin glowing against his olive washboard abs. “You like the way he fucks them?” Angelo asked himself now pumping his rod faster into my cunt. “Yes sir, I do, he’s so hot but he should be fucking some boys!” I said, my mind occupied only by a lust for cock. “Okay,” he replied, as his bulky forearms forced me deep onto his rod. I had been royally dicked down last night but this was the new deepest he’d been. I could feel him in my guts. “Try this,” Angelo said, switching the input to his digital recorder, and starting to take control of me again.

The screen was snowy as Daddy bent me over the coffee table again, the dildo laying there was still slick with my ass. Angelo’s appetite had increased and he began to lay into me. His strong frame beating down on me as his manhood penetrated me deep. “UUuuuuuhhhhhgghhhh please Daddy” I moaned as Angelo spanked my ass. “Yes take my Daddy dick boy” he grunted, his thick member pounding me. I turned my head to look at him, his muscled chest and arms silhouetted by the light behind him, his eyes burning into mine as he took ownership of my ass. Another series of spankings rained down on my ass, Angelo grabbing my hair once again, forcing my eyes forward. As he worked out my slit, my eyes gravitated back to the TV and I was shocked. There I was; a thin twink being rammed by a god-like daddy on TV!. Angelo had a camera filming the whole thing! I was entranced by the footage, watching him fuck me in real time was incredible. It was like being the bottom in a porno whilst watching it! “Yeah thats right I’m filming you Baby, so you can watch back and remember whose ass this is” Angelo said, his strokes getting deeper and harder. “It’s Daddy’s ass now” he continued my ass blown open by the ferocity and speed of the fuck. “Yes Sir” I panted, as he fucked me “Please breed me, please Sir make me your boy.” Angelo fucked me for few more minutes, alternating between rough pounding and slow, deep penetrations as he caressed my ass and kissed me. He was such a good lover, he gave me everything I wanted, all the cum I needed. Angelo’s fucking had reduced my cock to a shrivelled date, useless now that my asshole was his Fleshlight. Looking back at the TV I admired the scene, my perfect porno; A thin twink being dominated and bred by a hunky bearded daddy. “Please feed me your seed sir” I begged, wanting nothing more than to have Angelo breed me. “Please breed my cunt Angelo, I need your seed” I called, trying to tighten my worn ass around his monster. “Beg for it” Angelo grunted, pulling my hair again. “Please give me your cum Daddy, please” I moaned, the sound of him fucking me deafening. Angelo doubled down, he pulled my hair till it hurt and fucked my ass ruthlessly, his gorged phallus hollowing out my boy pussy. “Please daddy, I need your cum” I begged “Breed me, please, breed me like your bitch Daddy.” Angelo let out a roar, the head of his cock somehow moving deeper into my guts. I felt the cum spring forth, Angelo’s precious seed oozing into my asshole as he shot potent loads into me. He slowly fucked me, working his fresh seed deep into my pussy. “Nice and deep Sebastien, Daddy’s gotta breed you nice and deep.” he moaned as he worked his cum further into my hole, his cock not quite finished spurting.

I looked at the reflection of the scene in the television, Angelo’s body hulking mine as he pulled his thick cock out of my abused hole. “Don’t spill a drop” he said as he pulled out. Reaching over to the table he grabbed another butt plug, smaller than the oversized one from earlier. “Now I’m going to check your ass later boy and when I do, I’m gonna take out this toy” he said, Slipping the plug into my cunt. “And when I do, I want the load I just gave you to be there, okay?” he said as gently rubbing my freshly spanked ass. “Yes daddy,” I replied as he kissed me deeply. I was smitten with this man, his body, his cock, his attitude. And he had just filmed himself breed me! I was elated. We spent the rest of the afternoon lazing about his house watching TV and chatting. Around 5 he checked on “his hole” and was pleased to see that my ass had retained every last drop of his load. He plugged me back up and I sucked him off in the kitchen as he ordered some Chinese take away. I’m beginning to love this new daddy. Before bed Angelo made me look at my hole in the mirror, plugged with heart-shaped pink princess plug. He called me his “little princess”. I woke up around 4.30 when I felt his erection poking into my back. He bred me again, gently this time. Kissing my back and neck as he filled me up. Angelo slipped the plug back in, now lubed up with another of his loads before kissing me and falling back asleep.

He knew what was right for me. He knew it as soon as we met at the gay bar in Hartford. It was my first time there. I had such hopes. Such desires. He knew what they were as soon as we met, as soon as we started talking. His eyes took control of me. His words. As the evening went on and we swapped rounds, I knew. He knew. The invitation back to his place was accepted. My first time to a gay bar. No reason ever to go back, ever. He took me, taught me, made me, me, his, his, his, to use, to give, to sell. He knew what was right for me. And so it is.

The start…

I was 30. I was married. No children. A good looking wife. But cold as an icicle. And I had gotten to the point that I was not interested in sex with her, just as she was uninterested in sex with me. She cut her hair short, switched to a sort of severe dress style, and spent as much of her free time as possible with one other woman, single, quite butch, with some crazy tattoos, virtually no tits so she never wore a bra, I could see the rings in her nipples. Then one day, the wife just said, “Baby, I am a lesbian. I am moving with Jane tonight. Consider yourself free from this moment on. Just start the paperwork for the divorce so Jane and I can marry as soon as possible. I love her. I do not love you. I want Jane 24 x7. So, fired by my lesbian wife. OK. So where did that leave me?

I was not going to go looking for a woman. Just no interest anymore – though I did spend time looking at butch lesbian porn on the internet. Fuck same-sex sex was so hot. What a proper balance. And what intensity. So why not look at all-male sex. Fuck that seemed even better. My cock told me. My animal brain told me so. It was so. I knew it was so.

But here I was, not so good at making contact. Hell, I had married a lesbian without knowing it at the time, and she told me she had known when we married. She married me because I was nice and it pleased her parents. Now fuck the parents. Her hungry pussy wanted pussy, not cock. Now what did I want?

So, a process. Just watching porn was after a while just so futile unless it led me to some action. It was not enough to watch and jerk off. But I did that a lot. I looked at some “dating” apps, but what was that all about? I was pretty wimpy. And I have to admit I finked out on some dates. Not good. I lived in an area with not a lot of men on the prowl, or so it seemed. And I was blowing them off when something told me I should be blowing them.

I got myself to go to a local adult “book” store. Precious few books. A lot of videos. And some booths, some had glory holes. I went. That did help. I sucked my first cock through a glory hole. I was amazed. I really liked it. Better than eating pussy, though I had liked that, and I had seen that men ate ass. I felt I would have to try that if I could. And I enjoyed being in the booth. I learned to keep my door unlocked and so graduated to sucking cock without the anonymity. That was very cool. Then I had a guy wanted to fuck me. I told him I was not clean. He wanted clean. But I felt like I wanted this. But it was no going to happen that day.

I learned about getting clean. Living alone meant I could just do it. I did. Two days later I was back at the ABS. I sucked some cock. Got nude in the booth. I left the door unlocked. Damn if the same guy did not come in. He told me he had seen me come in. “Clean?” I said, “Yes.” He said I will fuck you now. He lubed his cock, lubed my hole. He fucked me. I really, really liked that. He fucked me bareback. My first time getting fucked. And it was raw. Insane. But I liked it. I think I knew I was on to something.

I knew I would and did go back. I sucked any cock put in my face, took any cock offered. All men. Only bareback. I put a lot of money in the video machines. I went home with a lot of loads in my stomach or in my ass – why waste the delight? I went home with a lot of cum in my ass. I learned what to do to protect the upholstery in my car. I did not care if I had a wet spot on my pants when I walked back into my apartment. And I sure did enjoy feasting on any cum and ass juices I could get once I got home. It is incredible to feel a load spill out of your hole. Crazy feeling.

But this was so not social. And if there was anything that sucking and getting fucked had begun to tell me is this – I was not so shy as I thought. At least in the anonymous setting of an ABS. Now another test. See what the results told me to do. And do it.

The divorce went through. The wedding ring was long off. That finger no longer bore the tell-tale signs of having worn a ring. And there were the last six months of cum sucking and sum taking. There was no going to bars to meet women. None. I knew that was a waste. It was time to go to the kind of bar I knew would be better. There were two in town.

I could no longer really be concerned about meeting some I knew in a gay bar. I was no longer married. I no longer worried abt being seen when went to the ABS. Yeah, the ABS, where I more than once found myself sucking or the taking the cock of someone I knew from work, or my apartment complex, or from church. At work there were 2,000 people. I didn’t act embarrassed when we met in the halls. They didn’t. We could meet in the hallways or in the cafeteria – no problem. More than once a chance meeting in the hallways or cafeteria led to a blow job in a remote bathroom. Shit. That was good. Two times I had been able to take the cock on a neighbor two floors up. And the priest… you can guess. And he was the guy warning us from the pulpit about the evils of pre-marital sex. I learned that I might not be able to get the eucharist because of the breakdown of my marriage, and never be able to re-marry in his church, but I could suck his cock and get his cum. So much for the battle with Satan and the Forces of Evil.

From being a sexless married man, I was getting to be a cum sucking, cum eating faggot… cool… but I wanted more. Not just occasional sex. Even sex without a relationship. Do you know what I mean? Maybe some social life? Mabe more…

So, one night, not a week ago, I went finally. Where? To one of the gay bars in my city. I went to Chez Est. I did not know “what” to wear, so it being a summer evening, slacks, short-sleeved shirt, no socks, loafers, a red jock. And I knew to be clean. Being clean made life so much easier. That one time at the ABS had taught me to be clean. Living alone made that was so easy to do. I had come to enjoy my enemas. And crazy me, why not put a BOOF up my hole?  Why not?

What an experience entering. Darkish though with discreet lighting. Music – not too loud but basic and driving and arousing. All men. All kinds. All hot in their way. Tables and two long bars. I looked at the bartenders. Hot. No shirts. One with long blond hair. One with big nipple rings. One tattooed. The fourth just… I was in the right place. But everyone seemed to be in a pair or more. Everyone seemed like they knew someone or had come with someone. I was solo. I did not see anyone I knew. If I saw anyone I knew, why not go up to them and say hi. No one. Solo.

There was one spot at the bar. I walked up. The bartender with the big nipple rings asked me what I wanted. I told him a double Black Label. No reason to be cheap. He brought me the drink. We agreed to run a tab. He took my credit card – he knew may name.

“First time here?”

“Yes.”

“I thought so. Welcome. Enjoy. If you get lonely, I can make some introductions.”

“Thank you.”

“What you are here for?”

“Just looking. Well…” I told him that a) I was my first time here, and b) that I did not know what to expect, but c) it would be very nice to get to know someone.

“To …,” he asked.

“Well, get to know. And…”

He asked, “G, B, C… letter?”

“Probably G, even though I had been married, not Bi. And beyond curious.”

“But not experienced with this scene.”

I admitted, “Yes.”

“No problem. Most of the guys here were once where you are now. Welcome. Get back to me if you would like anything.”

“Let’s start with a another double.”

“A good start… back to you. I’m Sandy, and you are?”

“Jeff.”

“Welcome Jeff. And by the way, you are cute. I might like to get to know you if are still here after 1 and haven’t met anyone.”

“Thank you, Sandy!”

I was only then that I noticed a pentagram tattooed on Sandy’s right arm. What did that mean?

            It was now time for the second double. I turned to look into the room. All pairs or groups. Then…

HE walked up to the bar.

“Hello. I’m Andre.”

“Jeff.”

“Don’t think I have seen you here.” This was a question that I felt I had to answer.

“No, first time,” I said.

“Nice.”

“Join me for a drink?” This guy seemed like a good place to start tonight after my conversation with Sandy.

“Sure. Thank you.” Andre had a compelling voice.” And, would I be right were I to guess you would like to make some new friends?”

“Yeah, I am looking to meet some new people here. Sandy, how about again for Jeff. My usual.”

Sandy nodded his head, smiled. He brought the drinks. I like having a good supply on hand. Andre did not seem to object,

Andre. A bit older. Same height. Probably the same weight. Very white blonde hair. Handsome in a way, well handsome. With incredible eyes. Blue. Piercing. Commanding. His shirt unbuttoned to the waist. I looked. Of course, I looked. Hot chest. No Hair. I could see one nipple pieced and surrounded by that symbol – yes, that is where I had seen the pentagram, the same one I saw on Sandy – you see when you look at the popper training videos that include references to Satan. I wanted to try poppers. Why hadn’t I bought them at the ABS? Next time. Andre. I liked what I saw. I was drawn to him. I could not help looking into his eyes. I saw my reflection, well not quite a reflection, some kind of me made different. This was going to be interesting. I felt I was meeting some one important, someone who knew…

When he gave me my drink, Sandy had said to me that I would like Andre. He whispered it in my ear. He got so close I could feel his tongue flick my ear. “You will really like Andre. If he invites you to his place, go. No questions asked. Not everyone gets an invitation. Not everyone. It is special. I have been there.”

Andre. This was interesting, at least for me. And Sandy was right. I did like Andre from the start. I did. And I do. And I will…

We talked and talked. Two more rounds. I was more than feeling the effects. I was feeling good. He had suggested adding a kicker to the last round. I agreed. I had already told him I would come back to his place. Was I thinking straight? How could I do that. Andre had reached right into me and shown me that I was gay, gay like him and all the other men in Chez Est. Yes, I knew I wanted to go back with him. See what happened. No wife. No family. Work was work. It was a Friday night. Why not? Why not?

I had shared with him my “story” ending up with being here. He told me that it was a good story, a story common to men, so many men, not yet enough men, men who really were gay, for whom the male bond was the real bond in life, where love is and was and would be. And that fulfilling that could take such men, men like him, and maybe me, to a world that had a different focus. And maybe it did include me. Andre told me it included him.

I agreed. The scotch was more than helping me relax. And I wanted so to be open. Just not have to be worrying about every word I said, like at work. This place was helping me be me.

While we were sipping out last round, Andre leaned in. Kissed me. His tongue in my mouth. On the tip of it I felt some kind of pill. I swallowed. I knew I wanted to do whatever he wanted me to. He seemed so to know what was right for me at the moment.

The power of the drinks. The power of the pill. As he spoke more about his life and focus, I felt the power in his eyes as he looked into mine. He told me to look in his eyes while he spoke to me. I did. I wanted to. I could not help but look in his eyes. They drew me to him and from him I found myself beginning to see the world with new eyes, hungry eyes. Gay eyes. Eyes not just cruising for sex, by looking for a different way to look, to focus. This was compelling. He was compelling.

I affirmed to this man I had only met, met in gay bar, but someone who did not feel like a stranger, that I was gay. I was where I was to be. I told me it felt like I was always meant to be here. That I was meant to go home with Andre. That what he was telling me made so much sense. It made sense of the world. It established my place in the world. It was like one of those messages from a prophet, from someone channeling God, but this was not the God I had heard about in churches with the rejection of the flesh. This was a different God, a God embodied at the moment for me by Andre. His eyes. His words. The electric touch of his lips. In that moment when he touched my naked arm and my cock just sprung to an instant erection, an erection straining my slacks, an erection he saw, and then… touched.

I recalled at that moment a poem by Emily Dickinson: #269

Wild Nights! – Wild Nights!

Were I with thee

Wild nights should be

Our luxury!

Futile – the winds –

To a Heart in Port –

Done with the compass – 

Done with the Chart!

Rowing in Eden –

Ah – the Sea!

Might I but moor – tonight –

In thee!

Yes, I would moor in Him. My Eden would be in Him. No need for a Compass or Chart. They would be him, Andre. In that sign on his chest. In my homosexuality and what that would become.

Wild nights – might this be one!

It was.

It was time go. Sandy winked as I left. Sandy did a thumbs up to Andre.

“You liked Sandy?”

“Yes.”

“You will meet again. He is one with me.”

One with me. What did that mean? A partner, roommate? I would find out tonight as part of this Wild Night.

I followed Andre home. I was feeling so very good, so relaxed, I was so ready, so hungry. He lived in an apartment tower not far from where I worked. I knew the way, though I found I had to drive very, very carefully, not drunk really as much high in an amazing way. The auras of the traffic lights amazing! I was going to the right place tonight. He seemed to know just what would be right for me. I had never felt that before. Maybe there was a hint in the anonymous blowjobs and fuckings leading up to this. But never this. And all he had done was touch me once, and kiss me.

I parked in a guest space. Andre met me at the elevator. He took my arm and guided me into the elevator. As soon as the elevator doors closed, his mouth was on mine, kissing, tonguing.

“Jeff I know you want to be mine.” There was a special sound ashe said ‘mine.” I was taken by it. Felt I knew what that meant. Felt the right answer was, “Fuck, yes.”

He unlocked the apartment door. We went in. He closed the door. He took me into what must have been his living room. It was a room like no other I had seen, something like a shrine, looking something like a sex dungeon but with something that looked like an altar, with candles and a pentagram on its front, an altar with places to restrain someone’s hands – spread, and in front, places to restrain someone’s ankles while worshipping. It felt like home, where I was supposed at that very moment to be. The basic colors were black and red. The lighting was red. On the floor in the middle of the room was a square space with raised sides, an what could be a soft, rubber floor, marked with a pentagram. In the points of each star were brackets like I saw on the altar that I now knew could be used for containing what I sensed was an object of worship. On one wall was a St. Andrew’s cross. Next to it an array of floggers. Where the dining room was was a sling suspended from the ceiling. Tall candelabra stood nearby. Also a place for the focus of worship.

I wondered what that would be, how we would worship there and in the living room, because that was what I felt I wanted to do right here, now, begin the worship of the different God Andre had been telling me about. I was here. In a what seemed to be a kind of holy place, but with a kind of special angelic presence that felt good and right and energizing. Funny, but it reminded of that feeling you can get when you visit a monastery – a place set apart to praise God,  where you know that this is a place for you. Here? Was it really that kind of place.

Soon the rooms where willed with a low kind of music, a kind of chant, mesmerizing, beautiful, celestial. Male voices only. I began to make out some words – praise, worship, bow down, penis, anus, Lord, amen. Andre spoked to

“Jeff. The house rules are simple. Nude when the door closes.”

“Yes, I like that.” I stripped. I knew there was no reason to be shy here, not in Andre’s presence. I would follow him. Where? Anywhere? Yes.

Andre stripped. An amazing sight. Toned body. My eyes were first riveted to his chest, his nipples, pierced. His nipples surrounded by the sign of the interlocked arcs– that shape you saw on toxic waste containers. Riveted. His breasts were a bit rounded, not quite feminine, androgynous, beautiful, enough to hold and worship. I wanted to worship them. Maybe something I had taken made my senses more alive, but what I saw was what I knew I wanted, really wanted. He knew it. His legs. His ass. His arms. His chest. His neck. His face. His cock – damn his cock growing before my eyes! I wanted His hands on me, his cock in me, and, yes, and I did not then understand it, his hands in me. I fell down on my knees. Looked up. Opened my mouth. He gave me his cock. It was like an electric shock ran through me. Without any reservation I started to take his piss, swallowing hungrily. His piss. I had never thought of doing this. Drinking piss. This was magic.

“Drink me. Drink this. Remember your new Lord.”

I did.

“Jeff. Time to talk again. Some wine.”

“Yes.”

Andre walked into his kitchen. His cock rock hard. My desires on overdrive. I was where I should be me.

He came back. Two wine glasses. He put them down. We drank. I stared into his incredible eyes, taken over by his gaze.

“Jeff. You do want this?”

“Yes.”

“Good. My Lord, and soon your Lord, is a different kind of Master and Guide. Not someone distant and disdainful of the world. Someone in love with the world, its imperfections, its possibilities. This Lord calls us to fulfill the life we have, here, now, completely. This Lord knows that men are for men; women for women except when there is a need for procreation. Otherwise sex is homosexual. The sex you have discovered is YOU. Is ME. Raw, without limits when part of worship, worship that we will perform tonight. Do you want this?”

“Yes.” Some power was swirling through my body and brain. “Fully.”

“Good.”

Here I was, nude, aroused, in this strange apartment, with this totally compelling man, giving my faith, my self – body and soul – to a Lord I barely knew but whose power seemed so manifest in Andre. I was captured. I wanted to be converted. Made into me. Knowing that my homosexuality, this homosexuality was not the random choice of a frustrated man, but the coming to the reality of what it meant to be male, to be me.

I drank. I drank. New ways of arousal, openness, desire ran through me. My brain was not my brain. It was His!

“Jeff. From the moment I saw you, I knew you should be here. You looked like I did, then.  When I finally went into my first gay bar, I went first to see if I could cross the line to a new life, little did I know it would be to a renewed life. You were me. And how you responded to me, told me you were me then and I was to be for you now, and that it was my call to call you to you and to a new Lord, my Lord, our Lord. The one his high priest brought me to my new Lord that first in the gay bar, in fact the one you and I were in tonight. While not all who go there are one, many are.”

I was feeling incredible. I felt like shackles had fallen from my limbs, that blinders had feel from eyes and that I saw for the first time, I saw, and knew, knew where I must go, not just should go, that I stood at the door. This man, Andre, knew what was right.

“A new Lord?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“His Name”

“He is both a He and a She. For us he is a He. Some call him Satan. I, we call him the Lord of Living, the Lord of Freedom, and we can call him Lord Satan, a Lord of goodness, not evil because Satan stands for freedom.”

“Yes.”

“Say the Lord’s Name!”

I felt a force surge through me to say the name. I felt Andre’s hand on my hard cock. Then I felt his mouth on my cock. Then I said, “Lord, Lord, of Living, Lord Satan!!!”

He broke away from cock to ask, “What do you ask?”

He took my cock back in his mouth. I erupted with an orgasm that seem to come to me, not from within me, when I said, “Make me Yours. I want to be Yours!”

He stood. We kissed. He shared my cum with me. He said, “Your desire will be granted Let us take our next step in worship. You will find that our Lord loves this world and asks that we accept it and celebrate it through our homosexual love.”

I am not sure I can be a reliable narrator from here on. I can tell only about what I remember. Will I remember everything, tell everything? Not likely. My mind that night was in a swirl and it only got better as the evening wore on, as the weekend wore on, and calling in sick, as the week wore on, ending in being where I find myself now… a new Lord, a new Life, deep freedom in my thrall to a new Lord – fully homosexual. I love saying that this is what I am. With affirmation.

So, let me work on remembering. If things come out of order, for give me.

Andre took me into the center of the Pentagram. He attached my wrists and ankles to four of the five rings in the floor. The star was small enough that I could be on my hands and knees, though large enough that my legs were spread to expose my hungry, yearning ass hole. Andre changed the lights so only spots fell on me. He was in the dark, with just a background of low, red light. I was kept nude. He put on a leather harness, a leather jock, and a leather hood with open eyes and mouth. He put of an eyeless hood on me.

“You will see now with your inner eyes. You will feel with your inner senses. You will accept what I give you.”

“Yes!”

I loved being in the dark.

He put on different music, low, beating, music, sensuous. Then he put earphones over my head so I could focus on what sound meant for me, the sound would become so focusing. A combination of the music and Andre’s words in my ears, his voice modified to make it even more compelling, magical, commanding. I heard. “Love. Love. Serve. Serve. Open to. Open to. Give yourself. Give yourself. Lord. Lord. Satan. Satan. Love. Love. Love men. Service men. Satan loves life. You love life.” Every so often Andre say, “Say Amen.” I did. I said Amen. Over and over. The music played over and over and over, Andre’s chant was  mesmerizing. I was alone with the music, with Andre’s voice, with my response. From time to time a small bottle was placed at my nose.

“Breathe.” The mask had breathing holes. I felt Andre use a finger to close one nostril. “Hold.”

“Breathe. Deep. Hold.”

I felt a wave of desire. A wave of hunger.

Andre asked, “Ready?”

I did not ask for what, I knew the answer was yes, so I said, “Yes.”

“Shout it.”

“YES!!! YESS!!!”

“To whom?”

“Lord!”

“Who?”

“SATAN.”

“Yes, our Lord Satan is coming to you, to welcome you as you come to him now. Jeff, You are a homosexual, you will become a pig,His pig, a slave to the freedom Satan offers.”

“YES, YES, YES.”

I heard him chant again. Then, for the first time I heard another voice. It was Sandy’s. Sandy. He was here. He was probably nude. Probably Hard. So hot. So right to have him here.

“YES, YES, YES.”

I would soon find out what that would mean, though there was more chanting, more calling to Satan, then touching, two sets of hands on my hungry body. Andre’s. Sandy’s. Lips on my nipples. Hands stroking my cock. Hands on my ass. Fingers probing my hole. The mask had an opening for my mouth, so cocks in my mouth, yes, cock, cock, cock. My mind was swirling with desire, with lust, wanting, wanting… more… more.

“YES, YES, YES, YES!”

Cock sucking had never felt better. How natural for me to have a cock in my mouth. And I was able to take it deeper than I had ever done. In fact, I was amazing to be able to take it beyond what had been my gag reflex. What was happening to make that reflex seem to disappear? I could feel Andre’s cock, or Sandy’s cock in my throat, like it was now a cunt. My new faith had made it a cunt too. I love it when the cock head was on my lips, being able to kiss and tongue it. I wanted cum. I tasted the flowing pre-cum.

“Feed me cum.”

“No, feast on the nectar of the Lord.”

The cock on my lips began to pulse and was thrust into ye mouth. Ropes of cum. No gagging. Swallowing. Stopping. Resting in my mouth, my throat. Deep.

“Take my cum.” It was Sandy.

“Take his cum.” It was Andre.

His load. In me. Yes.

“Yes, yes, yes, thank you.”

“A gift of the Lord for the people of the Lord. Holy food of heaven from man’s body.” I heard Andre say those words.

Then one of the men put another mask over my hood. I breathed in. Poppers.

“The incense of Satan.,” said Sandy.

Andre said, “This will be intense.”

It was intense, incredible. I felt myself transported to a higher level of desire. This was an incense. Praise the Lord.

Then began in incredibly sensuous taking of my hole, the sweetest fucking I had ever had. Not like anything I had experienced before. The playing with my hole. The impaling. The incredible feeling of cocks entering and leaving. No wonder I was here. I was a homosexual. Yes. They fucked me. I felt two loads pumped into me. Yes.

“Thank you, Lord.”

“Yes, thanks for the Lord.”

They took off the mask, then stopped. Took of the hood. Sandy and Andre gave me their cocks to suck, to clean, to savor.

“With our seed, you now come closer to us, by mouth, by hole, from us, to you, we in you. One day you in us. Our fluids, our fluids.”

“Yes.”

They freed me from the restraints. My body shook with fulfillment, desire.

 We passed around a single cup filled with a sweet wine.

“This is our cup. Filled with wine, more than wine. Drink this. You drink this. We drink this. Let our worship continue, sharing our bodies as gay men, dedicated to the sexual worship of our Lord.”

I said, “Amen.”

We drained the cup. Then had another, individual cup. We drank. I was transfixed.

Andre asked, “Bob are you ready?”

“I am.”

New waves of lust and excitement were washing over me. In the red light our bodies all glowed now.

Andre and Sandy offered me their cocks. I took them. Sucking one, then the other, then both. Their hands were on my head – a kind of laying on of hands.

“Suck us, suck us…”

My body was electric. My mouth was insatiable. The door of the apartment opened. Three more men entered. They stripped. Then stood at three of the points of the pentagram, cocks hard, bodies red in the light, their nipples pierced, their nipples surrounded by the toxic sign Andre and Sandy bore on their chests. Was I joining them. Yes!

Andre and Sandy stepped back to a point.

Andre said, “Now taste of them, Bob.”

 I did. Each cock was in its way awonder, one so thick I could barely take it my mouth, one slender one with an incredible mushroom head; one was black, one Hispanic, one Asian. Slim, burly, tall, short, nude, men, hard, their cocks in my hungry mouth. I wanted their cum.

Then we all shared a cup.

“Bob,” said Sandy, “now it is time for you to observe our worship, to learn more of what we do and how we do it. Then you will be asked to join fully.”

“Yes, Andre.”

There were five.

I was attached to the St. Andrew’s Cross. My mind was awash in desire for men. I would be able to watch.

They formed a kind of circle on the floor. They lay down. They formed a circle of cock sucking men. It was beautiful. I wanted to be part of it. One day, I would be. The sucked cock. Held ass. Then they rose and formed a line. Ass eating. Only Andre was not eating ass. I wanted to eat. Then the got on their knees, joining their bodies with their cocks. Their cocks. My mind was on fire.

And then, the created a circle on their knees. What were they doing. They began to fist each other. Five men fisting. How easily their holes took a fist. I had only seen fisting in videos. Now it was real, in front of me. Real. Would my hole become like theirs? I wanted it so.

They broke apart. Sat in a circle. Holding hands.  It was so sensual.

Jeff broke from the group. He released me from the St. Andrew’s Cross.

“Are you ready?”

“Yes, brother. I am ready.”

Jeff lifted me up, and led me to the sling.

“Get comfortable, Bob. Get comfortable. You are becoming one with us.”

You know a sling. How it nestles you and holds you for getting fucked and fisted, how the head end can be adjusted for sucking cock. I was in it. A first for me. Amazing. Andre secured my wrists and ankles, adjusted my ass so it was properly open. Sandy gave me his cock to suck. How I wanted it. His cock. To join fully. I had decided to join. Sandy started to fuck my face. My head could fall back in the sling so he stood behind my head and I took his cock as deep as I could. My mouth flowed with saliva. My hole would be next. Andre stood along side the sling and told me that I would now be bred by the three men who had joined us, that their hot, special loads would join the loads already in my ass, that they would fuck me without restraint, and that sometime during this fucking I would receive a special gift. I would be slammed. He asked if I knew what that was. I said “yes, yes, yes.” He told me it would happen, and that the night would continue.

Andre and one of the other men paired off so they could fuck while I was being fucked and fed cock. It was so hot seeing these rothers breeding so freely, flip fucking, ass-to-mouth sucking. The fifth man kept his hands on my body, rubbing it, massaging it, pinching my nipples, rubbing my body with oil. Then the three began to circle me, fucking me, feeding me cock, working my nipples with suction devices. I was so turned on by sucking cocks right out of my ass. Fucked raw. Raw cock in my mouth. My nipples distending from the suction. Fucking, sucking. Andre and his friend joined the circle. Fucking me, fucking me. My hole was on fire. Five men gangbanging my hole, my hole. This was so far beyond any dreams I might have had.

“Fuck, he is so open. His hole is pulsing, reaching for cock. Let’s open him more!”

“Yes, more.”

But first, we each must fill him with the fluid of our love, and in turn allow him to taste that fluid in his mouth.”

“Amen”

Now they would finally cum in me. Yes. The fucking resumed. Then five loads. Five more times ass-to-mouth, this time with the funky taste of cum added to my juices.

They pulled back.

“Time?”

“Yes”

“Bob, are you ready?”

“Yes Andre!”

“Are we ready to consummate this worship?”

The five men began to chant, “Yes. Yes. Come Lord, Come Lord. To us. In us. In him. HIM in him. HIM in him. Mark him with our holy fluid full of you Lord. We Love him, we love YOU!”

Quiet. The sling gently moved. They prepared what looked like six needles for six… yes, I wanted this!

The circled around me. They started to inject each other going clockwise. They knew what they were doing. Prepping the arm. The injection. The shudder. The elation.

“Now you, Bob. Say this. Come to me Lord!”

“Come to me Lord!”

Then the injection. My God – the electrical jolt, the shock, the shudder, the transformation.

Andre said, “Now. Brothers. Now.”

And they began. As I became one with them, they chanted, “In him, for HIM. In him. For HIM. Make him US for HIM. Lord.”

This was it. I knew I had crossed over. Bareback, drugs, and T. Maybe there had been a turning back, but not tonight. Tonight it was the commitment to this new Lord. Andre was my high priest. I was be converted tonight to a new Lord.

Fuck the “normal.” If my ex-wife could be a lesbian… well, I am what I am, gay, a faggot, a pig, intense… go for it. I went for it. My body was no longer mine, no longer mine. It was HIS, theirs, Amen.

A new round robin began. My hole was the focus.

Another round of intense fucking. My hole so open, so hungry, my desire so overwhelming.

“More? More? More?

They turned my head to look at something they had brought into the room. It was large fist, placed so I could see it.

“This?” They asked.

“Yes.”

Then the feeling of not of a hard cock head at the entrance to me hole,  fingers, sometimes coning, touching, caressing my ass lips. Spreading them. Probing my well-fucked hole. Spreading. See how much it could open.

“Lord, let me in to the holy place.” That was Andre. A man on each of the four chains bean to rock the sling slowly. In my lust, I felt Andre lubing my hole, saw him lubing his hand, saw him position his coned hand to be right where my hole would be when the sling next rockedh is way. I felt the chains brought to their highest point. They let go. I swung towards Andre’s lubed hand. Then felt my anus stretch like it had never stretched.

“Owww.”

Then his hand was in me. They held the sling steady.

“Ah.”

In me. Shit, in me. He held it there, steady, then Andre started to rotate his wrist in me. Sensations never felt before radiated in all directions from my anus/rectum – so full, so stretched. Then he pulled back to stretch me more…
            “Yes!”

“Yes, Bob.”

“Yes, Andre. Incredible.”

The T rush made me insatiable for more. To be fisted. To give my hole to these men. My brothers who told me they were taking it for our Lord.

They did.

A rotation began. Fisting. Another fist. The sling set in motion. They let me take charge of the swing so I could feel like it was fisting myself.

A break for a rotation of fucking. My hole was so loose. So much like what I thought loose cunt would be like.

“Your hole is our cunt, Bob. Do you like it?”

“Yes.”

“We will eat from it now…”

And they did. Each of the five dived into my open hole, tonguing, touching, their faces came to my face wet with ass juices, slippery with lube. I kissed them hungrily.  

I wanted them to fuck me again. But first it was time for them to surround me and rake my body with small floggers, my skin becoming red, on fire, then hands reaching for my nipples, pinching, twisting… I was on fire. Why was I loving this? I was.

“Give your body!”

“Yes!”

“Give your soul!”

“Yes!”

“Be a slave to your Lord!”

“Yes!”

Then they stopped. In sequence they sucked my cock. My cock. They knew when to stop, when I was nearing explosion. The men not sucking my cock were now rubbing my body with oil, cooling my skin, but not my lust.

Another slam.

They started to fuck me again. Taking turns.

“Take our loads. Take our loads. Sweet loads of Satan! The food of your Lord. Amen.” They chanted this in unison as they fucked me. A wild night. In a new Port. Moored in the love of these men and Satan, their Satan, now my Satan. I craved this totally.

They stopped. MY cunt was empty. Cum was dripping out. Each man felched some cum for my hole and passed it to me.

“Food of the Lord.”

They gave me their cocks to clean with my tongue and mouth. I loved this amazing intimacy of my ass, their cock, their cum, my juices, my mouth. Union.

Then a new chant. “Fist him. Punch him. Destroy his hole and make it ours!” That was Andre.

Chanting began, “Lord for you. Lord for you. Another hole for Satan. Make this cunt Yours. Make this pussy ours.”

The T kept me so hungry. We were all hungry. My hole was fisted, brutally, with no regard for anything but its destruction and remaking it as a true cunt.

They twisted their fists in my hole. They milked my prostate. Cum flowed from my cock. They drank it did and then passed cum into my hungry mouth.

“Destroy my cunt!!! Destroy my cunt!!! I give it to you, to Satan!”  I shouted.

They did.

Sometimes two men joined their fists into a single fist, doubling my, stretching me, taking me where I now knew I should go. What had they done to my once tight hole? Remade it as a new place. Finally Andre stood at my gaping hole and double punch fucked me relentlessly, his fists finally just seeming to slide in with no resistance. No resistance.

His fists were wet with lube, and with some blood, my blood, the blood of anus and rectum.

Finally.

Andre commanded, “Bob, push on your cunt. Give birth to your rosebud.”

I pushed, pushed, then felt my hole seem to open out.

“What an incredible rosebud, Bob. We have in one night made you prolapse!  Your hole is so wrecked.” I heard Andre say that as he slipped his hand back into my cunt. He cradled his cock in the hand he had in my ass, then jerked off in me. The other four men did likewise… Five more loads. Five what I knew were toxic loads. Potent in their work because the blood was a sign that my cunt would absorb their gift.

I must have passed out.

When I awoke, only Andre was there.

I am still there. He knew what I wanted. I want this. I have not been to work for a week, not because I could not go, but I called in sick to be able to be here. I do not mind that my hole does not really want to close. I love the huge plug that keeps me open. Andre was put one out that I can squat on while at the altar. We manage any “mess.”

I am where I want to be. I want to stay here. Serve my new Lord, and my Master – Andre and his fellows who I so love to have use me as they want.

My worship will be getting me deeper and deeper in bondage. Andre has told me this. What I have experienced of BDSM is so wonderful. To be helpless under their sexual onslaught as the pig I am.

Thank you, Lord.

Luke is at his desk, only the lamp on illuminating the textbook before him. He swivels around and heads to the corridor. With the door open he can hear the normal sounds of life in the dorm. Music, video gaming and movies in progress. There are voices, some sounding excited, yelling out, others so low as to be a white noise. Indistinguishable utterances. He steps into the corridor and no one else is in it. Just light spilling out from open doors. He looks to his left, toward the elevators, then back to his right and begins to walk in that direction.

Twelve doors down, on the right, is room 439, this destination. He has put it off far too long. For weeks he has thought of going to that room, pulling the door closed behind him as he entered, and facing its occupant. The guy who is slightly taller than his five foot ten, just as muscular in his own way, although in a leaner build. He pictures him as he walks slowly to the door. How light reflects red from his reddish-brown hair, which is thick and wavy, and always in need of combing. The light freckles across the cheeks. The thin arched eyebrows over green eyes. Green eyes that are vivid, lustrous, like an emerald. The perfect teeth exposed when he smiles, and the dimples framing them. And the way he tilts his head back and to one side when he laughs aloud.

Cory. That is his name, and Luke utters it aloud as he passes another door.

A paper plane sails from left to right, from an open door into the one opposite. As Luke walks past, he looks left and sees the guys huddled around a television in the middle of a video game. He does not look right.

Passing two more doors, then two more, then two more, Luke remembers the subtle comments, the linger stares, the opportunities provided by Cory. Missed opportunities. Times he should have been brave, spoken up, let Cory know how he feels.

Room 439, and the door is pushed to but not latched. Light cuts through the gap, putting a line across the corridor floor. Luke breaks it, and knocks.

“Come in,” Cory calls out from within, and Luke feels excited to hear the husky voice. It sounds of smoky jazz bars and actresses of the black and white movie era, smoking cigarettes one after the next, the smoke curling around their long fingers as they defy norms.

Luke is here to defy norms.

“Hey, what’s up?” Cory asked, spinning around to face him.

Cory is down to his boxers and Luke surveys the muscular body again. He sees the bulging biceps, the well-defined pecs with their nipples riding high with the center hard, sticking out. He sees the abs, their undulating form that disappears into the blue boxers. And he sees the unmistakable bulge.

“I was wondering,” Luke begins, hesitating, unsure of himself. What if he is wrong? What if Cory is straight and he only imagined the signals, misread all the little gestures? What if he saw what he wanted to see and failed to see the aspects that would say otherwise? “Please don’t freak out. I could be wrong, and if so, I promise to leave you alone, but…”

“Come on, Luke. Ask me.”

“Would you like to go out with me? Dinner or something?”

“Like a date?” Cory asked, looking up with a serious expression.

“Yeah, like a date.”

Cory stares at Luke, face unreadable for what seems like an enormously long time. Then he grins, nodding his head.

“Yes. I was wondering if you were…you know…willing to go out,” Cory replies, leaning back in the chair. It stretches his body out before Luke who feels a strong desire to touch it. He knows the possibility now exist, and he smiles at Cory.

“I’m finished with my assignments. You want to go this evening? I could come down around seven and we could go to that Italian place on Hill Street.”

“That sounds good; I’ve only been once, but I did enjoy it,” Cory replies.

“I’ll see you at seven.”

The restaurant is not high ceilinged with a slick décor. It is very traditional, with low ceilings and a dining area divided up into small rooms. They are seated in the Greenhouse, the dining area that faces the courtyard that runs along the side of the building. The room has glass walls and roof, and at night it seems to be a part of the courtyard with its low-level lighting and the tables inside illuminated by a single candle. The table clothes are red and white checkerboard, the napkins are cloth, and the wait staff are dressed in black with white shirts.

Luke sits opposite Cory at a small two-top table, both dressed in white shirts and jeans. They look like a couple who have been together for a long time, not two guys on a first date. They whisper to each other, giggle or laugh, and lightly clink wine glasses.

Luke and Cory are alone in a dorm room. The door is closed and locked. They kiss. Touch each other. They feel what their eyes have looked upon before. Smooth skin, firm to the touch with the muscle beneath. The soft circle of a nipple; undulating stomach as the rate of breathing increases; the pulsing beat of blood coursing through veins. They feel alive, and with every touch more tangible than before.

Luke is nervous. He feels anxious, this his first time with another guy. But his desire and urges are overpowering. They let him push past his fears. He takes Cory by the hand and leads him to the bed. He lays back, guiding Cory to move on top. He feels the weight of him, the heat of his body against his own. It’s alive with breath and pulse and a charge that he can feel. Cory kisses him and he feels the softness of each, then the wet slickness of the mouth, the smooth surface of teeth, then the play of tongues.

Luke slides a hand down Cory’s back, over a round ass cheek, then around to the side where he slips it between them. Fingertips touch it, the hard cock, and he rakes them along its length. He slips fingers around it, feeling its girth within his grasp, then he works his hand along the length until the head is in his palm. He squeezes. He moves his hand. Cory moans into his mouth and shudders.

“Put it in me,” Luke utters, and he thinks of the old fear he once possessed, of this penetration, and he remembers the first time he fingered himself and how it made his orgasm more intense. He wants to feel that intensity again. The pleasure of it. He guides Cory to his opening and feels his tight resistance. He wants what his body is not sure of, and he whispers in Cory’s ear.

“Fuck me.”

Head thrown back, Luke stretches open for Cory, feels every inch penetrate his hole. He shivers with the initial pain, then clings to him as cock begins to piston inside his hole. The slow push inward, then the tug outward, he feels every inch move through his tightness. He releases Cory and watches him push up on hands and begin to fuck harder. He looks down and sees the thick cock being pumped inside him. With arms spread out, he clutches at the bed as Cory hammers his insides. Each push inward seems to touch something inside him. He moans and grunts, body undulating with every plunge of cock into his depths.

Arms come underneath each leg behind the knee and Luke folds in half, ass turned up and he watches Cory plunge back into his depths, all the way, hips smacking against ass. He stretches his arms overhead, pushing against the headboard. He stretches out and he sees Cory’s eyes look at him. Up and down his exposed body. It increases his arousal.

“Fuck me…harder,” Luke utters, and Cory moves down pushing his thighs against his chest. He is pinned to the bed, as cock hammers his insides. He feels every thrust, each deep penetration. Then he feels an emptiness.

“Sit on my cock,” Cory utters falling over next to Luke on his back. He holds up his cock, the thick shaft shiny wet, then strokes it. Luke watches the fist, as it moves up and down every inch.

Luke moves over Cory and eases down until the flared head breaches his opening. He keeps easing down until seated on it. He feels complete again, this connection between them. Hard thick cock buried inside his hole, locking their bodies together. He moves on it, up, then down, slowly at first, letting Cory watch his cock come into view, then disappear.

After a few minutes, unable to control himself, Luke leans back on his hands and works his hips faster. He sees the stare at his ass, knowing Cory is watching. The exertion of his body as he works his ass up and down. It does not take long, for he is far too aroused and he begins to masturbate while working his ass up and down. He needs to feel it. The hardness of his own arousal. He strokes to his rhythm, fast, furiously slamming his fist down to the base as his ass smacks down on Cory’s abdomen. Over and over, the bed rocking beneath them, until he comes. Thick wads erupt from his cock, hitting him in the face, the neck and a thick wad ropes up the middle of his chest. He shudders with his release, then feels hands grip his thighs as cock is thrust upward into his depths.

“OH FUCK,” Cory cries out, and Luke feels the cock flex inside him.

The date leads to more dates, then a relationship. They admit to some of the guys they are boyfriends. When going into town, they walk side by side, bumping shoulders and touching hands, and hold hands under bar or restaurant tables as they hang out with them.

Spring break finds them at a beach with a few of the guys. They watch the guys flirt with girls at the beach. There is flexing of biceps and sly smiles meant to lure them to the hotel room. They stay in the room when the guys head to the beach and fuck. They hang out at bars with the guys, then sneak off to some concealed place and suck each other off, giggling like mischievous boys at their antics. At night, when the guys go to a club or another bar, they stroll down the beach for a mile or longer, and fuck on the wet sand with waves lapping around the naked bodies.

The semester resumes and so does their life in the dorm. Lazy afternoons when it storms outside. Late nights that seem to last forever, until bodies are sweaty with muscles burning from their exertions. Early mornings after waking in each other’s arms. The sex does not end, for it never seems enough.

Summer and they are to be separated for weeks. The only respite to this separation, ten days in the mountains at a cabin Luke’s grandparents own. It is primitive, with a wood stove and exposed roof framing that allows the sound of rain on the tin roof to be overwhelming at times. They fuck in the old queen bed, on the screen porch, and down at the stream, Luke on his hands and knees in the cold water as Cory thrust into his depths. They use the hammock like a sling, Luke laying sideways in it, and Cory swinging him back and forth, impaling ass on thick cock.

Another year, and a deepening of their relationship. It continues through the year, the next summer, a trip overseas, the two of them backpacking from one small village to the next, then fucking late into the night. Eventually the senior year comes to an end, and they graduate. They move to Atlanta, set up an apartment and pursue their careers while their relationship matures. They travel. They visit family. They take part in protests and festivals for pride.

Someone yells, the voice echoing in the dark. Luke stirs, fumbles for his cellphone, confused about the time. Is it night or day, and what year? He sits up in the dark, flips on his lamp and sees his roommate is still not back from a late night in his studio. He looks around the dimly lit room, a moment of confusion still lingers, then he remembers the dream. The fantasy that was so embedded in his mind it bloomed into a dream that seemed far too real. Cory was down the hall, no doubt still studying. It was only six in the evening. Luke considered the dream, the way it played out in a way he so desperately wanted to be real. To be a truth. He had been thinking about Cory for four weeks, ever since the semester started and he first laid eyes on him. It was becoming an obsession, but the unknown aspects scared him. Was Cory gay? Would he be receptive to any advances Luke tried to will himself to do? There had been hints, looks casual and flustered, and stammered replies to his questions that sought some understanding of him. But it was all superficial, periphery aspects that circled the core characteristics.

Luke stood from his desk, washed his face, then stared in the mirror. He saw the person who had sworn college would be different from high school. That he would not be as introverted, shy about speaking up first, taking the initiative if that were necessary. A deep breath and he built up his courage. With keys in hand, he walks out into the corridor and toward Room 439.

A paper plane sails from left to right, from an open door into the one opposite. As Luke walks past, he looks left and sees the guys huddled around a television in the middle of a video game. He does not look right.

Passing two more doors, then two more, then two more, Luke remembers the subtle comments, the linger stares, the opportunities provided by Cory. Missed opportunities. Times he should have been brave, spoken up, let Cory know how he feels.

Room 439, and the door is pushed to but not latched. Light cuts through the gap, putting a line across the corridor floor. Luke breaks it, and knocks.

“Come in,” Cory calls out from within, and Luke feels excited to hear the husky voice. It sounds of smoky jazz bars and actresses of the black and white movie era, smoking cigarettes one after the next, the smoke curling around their long fingers as they defy norms.

Luke is here to defy norms.

“Hey, what’s up?” Cory asked, spinning around to face him.

Cory is down to his boxers and Luke surveys the muscular body again. He sees the bulging biceps, the well-defined pecs with their nipples riding high with the center hard, sticking out. He sees the abs, their undulating form that disappears into the blue boxers. And he sees the unmistakable bulge.

“I was wondering,” Luke begins, hesitating, unsure of himself. What if he is wrong? What if Cory is straight and he only imagined the signals, misread all the little gestures? What if he saw what he wanted to see and failed to see the aspects that would say otherwise? “Please don’t freak out. I could be wrong, and if so, I promise to leave you alone, but…”

“Come on, Luke. Ask me.”

“Would you like to go out with me? Dinner or something?”

“Like a date?” Cory asked, looking up with a serious expression.

“Yeah, like a date.”

Cory stares at Luke, face unreadable for what seems like an enormously long time. Then he grins, nodding his head.

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To get in touch with the author, send them an email.

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Life is more like the game where you spin and stuff is dumped in your lap.  When I was little, I wanted to be like my dad.  He worked hard, but when he came home, he played with my brother, my sister, and me.  He was interested in our day, and at least once a week, he made dinner while we did our homework so my mom could go out with her friends.

My mother would yell at him to take us out of the house; she needed a break. I never understood why she needed a break. We were gone most of the day at school. She sat on the back porch smoking cigarettes. The food we ate was never as good as the food I had at friends’ homes.

Up until I was twelve, my teddy bears were my children, and my large teddy bear was my wife. I grew up telling my siblings that I wanted six kids, three sets of twins. Even at a young age, they thought I was crazy. My brother Frank told me that kids would just tie me down. I’d never be able to travel and see the world. He said there was an operation that could prevent boys from having children, and as soon as he was old enough, he was going to have it done.

My sister didn’t want kids either. I heard her say once that she didn’t want some parasite growing in her like that fly worm she’d seen on a youtube video. I’d seen the video as well, and I knew having babies couldn’t be like having tweezers pull a larva out of your body.

As I said, life is like a spin of the wheel. We’d all received the birds and the bees talk. I even got a private bees and bees talk. My father said that he sensed that I was more interested in boys. I had noticed that I wasn’t interested in girls the way my brother was, and I was worried. But when my dad talked to me and I told him that I was scared to be different, he told me that there are lots of ways to be different.

“Liking boys when you’re a boy isn’t different, James. You’re the same as all the other boys who like boys. It’s not as though you’re choosing one over the other. It’s just the way you were made.”

His talk made me feel better inside, but as I learned more about human reproduction, I realized I’d never have three sets of twins with the person I wanted to marry.

My sister found the guy that she wanted to marry when she was fourteen. His name was Byron. They had their first baby when she was sixteen. At twenty, she had four kids. Mary and Byron were living in a rotting single wide trailer on an acre of land that they got really cheap when she first got pregnant. Byron may not have been smart enough to keep his pecker in his pants or to wait until he could buy a condom, but he was a really hard worker. He was lucky, too. A change in one of the roads made their land go from worthless to valuable. He was able to sell it, buy a portion of his daddy’s farmland, and built a small house that kept the rats out.

My brother fell in love with a girl who said she wanted ten children. He talked her down to two of them. Stella agreed; he married her, and he joined the coast guard. He loves the work, and he is stationed somewhere around a place called Marblehead in Lake Erie.

My brother was still in high school when I became a freshman. My mother seemed to have checked out after I confirmed that I was gay. My father was supportive to the point of telling me about guys who were rumored to be gay, “in case I was interested in dating them.” He made me laugh.

Sadly, there weren’t any guys I wanted to date in high school. Nor did I want to date any of the guys in town. No one piqued my interest. I hoped that would change in college.

Since neither my sister nor my brother went to college, the college savings fund my father had started with the birth of my brother had a hefty sum in it. He had also signed me up for the Texas program that allowed me to pay the tuition in place when I was born. I decided to go to the University of Houston for my undergraduate and hopefully law school.

I’m not sure what to say about my six years in Houston. I had a full course load. I met a lot of interesting people, and I met a lot of attractive guys. I think my mindset was not in sync with that of the other people I met. If I had wanted sex, the kind that you have and then go home and you never see that person again, I could have had that in abundance. I wanted love and romance, and once I was certain that I was committed to him, then I wanted the sex part. I guess that’s why, six years later, I went back home still a virgin.

Mr. Cheatham, pronounced ‘Chath’ with a long a and then an ‘um’ with a short u, had a place for me in his firm. I passed the bar the first time I took it. Then I began to work in the town I grew up in. The occasional gay man would come into the office for the usual mundane tasks of getting a will drawn up or having one amended. Sometimes, there was a power of attorney to help take care of an elderly family member. I dated about once every two months on average. I kept a check on the Grindr app, but most new guys were just ones who wanted to cheat or were just passing through town.

The biggest change in my life happened because of a simple mix-up. My sister had promised to take my nephew Matt to the next town over to get him a pair of New Balance tennis shoes on a day that she had promised the Lutheran Women’s Missionary League that she would be in charge of the Lutheran Girls’ Summer Retreat.

Matt was understandably upset, but he said he understood. I had stopped by to give her a couple of baking dishes I had borrowed from my mother and never returned. Mary said he was ‘out pouting by the barn,’ so before I left, I went to check on him.

He told me he was fine, but he’d been crying. When I pressed him, he said he felt he always took a back seat to the other kids and all the other things his parents were involved in. Stamp “sucker” on my forehead. I volunteered to take him for the fucking shoes. OK, I didn’t actually call them that, but I was thinking about it. Shit, why couldn’t he just walk to Walmart and buy himself a pair of shoes? No, these were special. Blah, blah, blah. So I told Mary I was taking him, and off we went. I shouldn’t have been so pissed about taking him, but I had big plans to go home and sit in front of the TV and wallow in my loneliness, and this kid was going to make me have a great time.

We stopped at the shoe store and got his shoes before going into Target. I wasn’t looking for anything in particular; I was just in the mood to buy something. Matt seemed drawn to the electronic pianos.

“You like those, huh?” I asked him as I watched him run his fingers over the keys.

“Yeah, Uncle James,” he looked up at me, smiling. “They’re cool. I get to play on a real piano at school.”

“That so? Are you taking lessons at school?”

“Sort of, but they aren’t like real lessons.”

“Can you show me what you’ve learned so far?” I reached over and turned on the keyboard.

He played for about a minute; it was a piece of classical music that I recognized but did not know the name of. When he finished, he looked up at me and grinned. I hugged him.

“How’s this different from a regular piano?”

“The number of keys is different, and it feels different when you play. The real ones have pedals.”

“Hmm. So a real one would be better than one of these.”

“A real one doesn’t need batteries,” Matt said, “but a real one is a lot more expensive.” He took a step back. “And these are expensive enough.”

“I think we should check it out.” I took out my phone and searched. “Hey, there’s a music store just down the road. Let’s go.” We were parked in front of the store within ten minutes. When we walked in, I could tell Matt was overwhelmed by all the musical instruments, but he went straight to a beautiful cherry colored upright.

I went for this beautiful hunk of a man who came out of the backroom and asked how he could help us. Life suddenly went into slow motion. Dress jeans and a plaid short-sleeved shirt clothed a man with curly brown hair, brown eyes, and evenly tanned skin.

“My nephew needs a piano.”

He smiled.

“And I need a date.”

“I can help you with the piano, but as my wife is expecting me for dinner, I can’t help you with the date. Besides, I think my sister is seeing someone. Sorry.”

“Hey, Steve, I’ll help them. You can go.”

I turned and faced a man with porcelain skin, blue eyes, and jet black hair. He stood almost six feet tall with a body that was the combination of a swimmer and tennis player. While his polo shirt with the company logo was a tad tight, it did show off his muscular chest. I wondered whether this place only hired hunks.

“So, you need a piano and a date. The first is easy; take your pick. As for the second, I’m not a matchmaker. But is it a special occasion?”

“I guess that depends upon him.” I smiled, and as I did, I noticed the wedding band.

Matt began playing the song he’d learned at school.

“I’m not really expecting you to set me up. I only said that because your partner is so handsome, it just slipped out. I will admit that you’re even better looking.”

“If you’re trying to get me to lower the price, the piano is already on sale; I’ll throw in free delivery in exchange for that compliment. My name’s Ethan.”

“My name’s James,” I told him. “And that’s my nephew Matt. He’s showing an interest in piano. I thought we should look at some uprights so he can play on the real thing.”

“We have used as well as new ones. He’s sitting at a used one. It’s a truly nice one. Many used ones, even when they are in excellent playing condition often have many nicks and scratches. This one is near perfect.”

“Do you like that one, Matt?”

“Yeah. It’s pretty, and it sounds better than the one at school.”

Matt started to play ‘Yankee Doodle’; he restarted several times. “I’m nervous, I guess.”

“Will he start taking lessons?” asked Ethan.

“I’m going to talk to his music teacher about that. He seems to like that one, and you’re telling me it’s a good piano. Let’s get it.”

“Come in the back,” said Ethan, “so we can fill out some paperwork.”

Twenty minutes later, I’d helped him load the piano onto the delivery truck, and I’d given him directions to my sister’s house. He’d called his brother Eric to do the delivery, so Matt and I headed home. He had a pair of new shoes and a piano. I had $3500 less in my savings account. A bargain if Matt or one of the other kids took to playing. I realized I hadn’t considered the cost of the lessons; I’d be paying for those as well. I felt a rush of sadness come over me as I was realizing my paternal desires through being an uncle.

We arrived at my sister’s and found several of the Lutheran ladies conversing in the living room and the children playing quietly in their rooms. Their meeting was coming to an end, and after they left. I told my sister about the piano. We made a place for it. I don’t believe she realized that I’d seen her roll her eyes, but I didn’t care.

The delivery truck arrived, and I spent the next fifteen minutes trying to hide my erection. Eric was a few years younger than his brother, and although they might have looked like twins, Eric was even more handsome, friendlier, sexier. He was also very serious and went right to work, and after he was finished, he retrieved some paperwork for me to sign.

“Will you sign here?” He pointed to the bottom of the page, and as I signed, he said. “My brother told me that you’re gay.”

I looked up into his beautiful eyes. “Yes, I am.”

“So am I.”

We stood there just looking at one another.

“How about we go out? Maybe now. I haven’t eaten.”

This Adonis just asked me out. I gave him his pen and grasped his hand. It was more than his good looks that excited me. I felt something new as I held onto him. “Yes, I’d like that. I’d like to get to know you. Let’s take your truck to my place, and then go get something.”

He smiled at me. I smiled back.

“How about barbecue?” We both said it at the same time, and then we both chuckled.

We ordered combination plates, and as we ate, he told me that he’d attended the local community college, received his associate’s, and continued to work for the family music shop, teaching piano and making deliveries. His one relationship was with a computer science professor at the college. “It never had the spark that I had always imagined a relationship would have, but we were comfortable with one another, and enjoyed the other’s company. He got a job somewhere else, and he never asked me to go with him.” Eric didn’t seem sad as he told me this; it was as if it were just another fact in his life.

He was quite surprised when I told him that I was still a virgin, and he was embarrassed to discover how attractive I found him. He admitted that he saw himself when he looked at his brother and simply saw his own flaws duplicated.

“I see only a very handsome man.”

“You need glasses,” he joked. “My eyes are crooked; one of my ears sticks out more than the other.”

“Don’t be silly,” I told him. “Those are minor variations that add to your sexiness.”

He reached out his fingers and brushed them against mine. “Are we going to be just good friends, or do you think there might be more?” he asked.

“I know for sure that we’re going to be friends,” I said. “But you make me tingle inside, so I’m hopeful that there’s more.”

He smiled and formed some dimples. “I’m glad because you make me feel something, too. It’s a feeling that I’m not sure I’ve ever felt.”

“Then we need to figure it out, don’t we?”

“Yeah. We do,” he blushed a little.

I moved my hand to get my napkin and knocked the bowl that held my green beans. They spilled into my lap. “Can’t take me anywhere.”

“Then next time, I’ll get it to go.”

I looked up at him, and he was so serious that I knew at that moment that I wanted him to make love to me. I wanted to look into his eyes as he filled me.

“What’s the matter?” Eric asked.

“Will you drive us back to my place?”

“Of course.”

We got up and made our way to my car. I pushed him against the car and kissed him. He kissed back. I wanted him to stay the night. Would he? We got into the car and I sat on a towel. My pants were dripping with bean juice. The entire bowl landed on my pants.

Eric found it funny, and I probably would have as well, except that my underwear was now wet, too. We made it back to my place without further incident. “Come inside? Stay the night?”

“I have to get the truck back. Can I come back tomorrow?”

“Of course,” I laughed. “Anytime.” Every time, I thought. I smiled and waved as he drove off in the delivery van. I felt overwhelmed with despair as he disappeared from view. Why did I do this to myself? I imagined a whole evening and night with him before even finding out whether he was ready or even able to stay. I felt rejected, but he hadn’t rejected me. He had obligations, and I was being an asshole by wanting to come before those obligations. No wonder I was alone.

I sat on a lawn chair in my underwear and t-shirt. I was inside the house, in the dining room, with the windows open, feeling the cold air blow across me. I was cold, but I didn’t close the windows or get a blanket. I stared into the darkness on the other side of the screen. Craziness reigned in my brain. By the time I nodded off, I had convinced myself that Eric, although he found me attractive, wanted to get to know me better, and might even sleep with me, had found my spilling the green beans to be an act of buffoonery and would only now want to be distant friends. Either that or when I asked him to stay the night, he realized I was a slut and probably lying about being a virgin.

I decided that he was a great guy; maybe he was better off without me. Maybe I should get dressed and go down to the bar at Main Street and the highway. I’d heard that the guys who didn’t pick up anyone were often good targets for desperate gay men. What should I wear? I couldn’t decide.

I fell asleep with dreams of being chased by pianos. The strings had come loose and grabbed me. They cut into my skin. The doorbell rang, and I awoke. The clock on the oven read 11:07; it was late, but not midnight yet. The house was freezing cold. I should have closed the windows. I went to the door and peeked out. The porch light illuminated a shivering Eric, still wearing his work clothes from earlier.

I opened the door, and he stepped in. “I know you’re going to think I’m crazy, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. I wanted to turn around and come back. I kept thinking how you’d ask me to spend the night, and when I said getting the work van back was more important, I thought you might think I was using it as an excuse to get away from you. I wasn’t. I dropped the van off and came right back. I was worried you wouldn’t want to see me again. And I want to spend the night with you.”

I wrapped my arms around him and held him tightly to me. “Maybe we’re both crazy, and maybe we’ve just found something special. We can decide that tomorrow. Right now, let’s close the windows and snuggle under a blanket. I want to brush my teeth first, though.”

“I need a toothbrush,” said Eric. “I didn’t bring one.”

“I’m a neurotic,” I told him. I buy them when they’re on sale. I’ve got a drawer full of them.”

“You’re my kind of guy.” Eric kissed me hard and passionately. When he pulled away, I could hardly catch my breath. “I’m going to need a shower, too.”

“You smell OK,” I told him.

“No, it’s not that. I want you to fuck me. I wanted you to when I first saw you, but I told myself that I needed to wait, but I don’t want to wait.”

I went to shut some windows. “I don’t have condoms.”

“Oh, fuck. I should have stopped to get some. I got tested after Thomas left, and I haven’t done any anal since, but still…”

“I trust you,” I told him. “If you say you’re clean, I believe you.”

“I am,” he said.

“And, I’ve never, so…” my voice trailed off. Would I be making love to this stud with no protection? Would I feel his skin against mine?”

He closed the last window. “Let’s shower.”

I led him to the bed after drying him off. He sat at the edge, and I got down on my knees and pulled his dick into my mouth. It was already hard, and I liked the way it felt as the head rubbed against the roof of my mouth and then slipped into my throat. I was glad I had practiced with the dildo I kept inside my nightstand. The ‘oh, fuck, yeah’ that came from Eric told me that he enjoyed my technique. It was a technique that I had dreamed about, fantasized about, and practiced.

Eric’s hand pushed me away. “I’m close. You need to stop. Wow, I can’t believe how good that felt.”

I reached down and touched my hard cock. It dripped with precum. I wanted to climb onto his dick and move up and down until I shot my load. Would he let me? I pushed him farther back on the bed.

“Like this, James?”

“That’s perfect,” I said. I moved so I could lower myself onto him. Just because his cock was the perfect size for my mouth did not mean I wouldn’t need to stretch to accommodate him. I’d left his dick wet, and I had applied some Vaseline to my ass as it was the only lubricant I had. I guess it was a good one since his cock slipped in very easily at first. There was some pain past the first inch or so. I tried to relax and allow my body to slowly ease down as he impaled me.

My deep breaths continued as I slid down and had him completely inside me. I looked down on him, and he smiled. I think at that moment, I was the happiest I’d ever been in my life. His hands moved up and we interlaced fingers. I could tell his hips were beginning to pivot. His cock moved slightly in and out. The frequency and amplitude of his motion increased. He was hitting the right spot; my balls tightened up. My dick got harder. I locked eyes with him and gripped his fingers with more force. Eric’s eyes widened as he pushed up into me and released his seed. The pressure inside me and inside my balls exceeded my ability to hold back, and I spurted my cum over his head and against the wall. I fell forward.

Eric rolled and we faced one another, side by side. I could feel his seed drip from my hole as he grasped me in his arms and pulled me to him. Our lips met again in a fury of kisses. Although out of breath, Eric was able to say, “That was incredible.” He moved his hands up and pushed my wet bangs out of my eyes. “That’s what it’s supposed to be like.”

I smiled broadly and kissed him. “It’s what I always imagined and more.”

“James? How long before you can fill me?”

“Not as long as you might think, you sexy man.”

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To get in touch with the author, send them an email.

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I lived in a semi-rural area (this was 1978) in Ohio. Next door was a small farm, I recall seeing a cow in the pasture, which was about 1 1/2 acre. There was a small barn and a cinder block house and garage. An attractive young woman lived there for a couple months, and once she asked me if I wanted a glass of tea. I said yes, and only many years later realized there was some kind of drug in it. After that, things proceeded to intercourse. She moved out a few weeks later. I’ve never regretted it, or felt like a victim.

After that, not a lot of girls around who wanted to have sex with me, but fortuitously, my father bought a Penthouse Letters (to the editor), or some such publication, about a year later. About the size of a TV Guide. It was kept on  a shelf in a closet, but I got into everything as young. I read, among many other things, a description of fellatio, and couldn’t wait to try it out on my best friend, who lived a couple houses up the road from us. 

He was a couple years younger than me, pale, long blond hair, and beautiful. He had a visible natural muscle development, but his skin was so soft, and he was, like me, well-endowed. I was a skinny, and black-haired. I remember very well the first time. I remember telling him “I know something that’s a lot of fun. Do you want to try?”. He said “OK”. I took his shorts down, not even thinking about the fact that we were clearly visible from the street or my neighbor’s house. I remember how he tasted, and it was good. I couldn’t wait to do it again, and we did pretty often. This was absolutely verboten at that time, which made it much more exciting.

My favourite time was one day that my parents left us alone, and I called him and asked him to come down. He was definitely in the mood. I sucked his dick for a while, and then I got all our clothes off. I pulled him on top of me on my parents’ water bed, as he asked “What are you doing?” I got my naked ass on the padded rail of the bed, so our feet were on the floor, and got our dicks beside one another, and started rhythmically thrusting with my hips, picking him up somewhat. After a few minutes, I was so into it, I closed my eyes. 

The next thing I knew, his lips were on mine, and I gladly opened my mouth. My first kiss (the woman had not kissed me)! We continued to see each other very occasionally, the last time when I was 27, when he briefly put it inside me. He called once since then and told me he’d been thinking about me.  But by that time he was married and had kids, and I was living with a woman. I still fantasize about him a lot, though. He is the only man I would consider abandoning the opposite sex for. I’ve been with a few other guys, briefly, since him, but nobody has turned me on like he did. 

At almost 53, I’ve recently decided to find a guy to have fun with. I definitely want to do that again before I’m too old. Wish me luck. And good luck to you!

Alben 83 years of age was retired and still in the best shape of his life and was a resident at a retirement centre complex and met a 96 year old man named Hendren . Alben has been gay all his life and had many encounters and Hendren was married for many years but had lost his wife years ago and has been single ever since. Alben and Hendren were taking at a gathering and got to know each other and became the best of friends.

One morning Alben was having his breakfast and coffee and was going to go over and visit Hendren he knocked on door but no answer so Alben went around to the back and knocked, but still no answer and he went to grab the door knob and the door was unlocked and he was able to walk inside leading to the bedroom and noticed that Hendren was still sleeping. Alben locked the door and took a peek under the covers and noticed that Hendren was naked and on his side showing his cute litte ass and Alben got excited.

Alben kicked off his sandals removed his shirt shorts and underwear and got in to Hendren’s bed and then Hendren started to move around opened his eys and saw Alben in bed with him. Alben how did you get in here? Hendren asked. Alben said you left your door unlocked and he said to Hendren you have a sexy body and he started to run Hendren all over. Hendern was stunned and could not believe what was about to happen, He said Alben I have never had sex with a man I have always be straight all my life..

I will show you how it’s done said Alben now lets kiss. Alben was kissing Hendren and they were looking into each others eyes and then Alben took the covers and sheets off them and they were on the bed uncovered and naked. I knew that you had feelings for me Hendren Alben said. yes I confess I do said, Hendren. Alben was kissing Hendren and slowly moving down his body kissing his nipples and sucking them OHH GOD! Hendern said.

Alben said now Hendren I am going to perform felatio on you. Hendren asked what is that? Alben said I am going to place my mouth on your penis and suck until you reach orgasm Alben started to suck on Hendrens little peter and Hendren was going wild. OHH THAT FEELS GOOD! Alben started to blow and Hendern giggled and says that tickles me pee pee Alben kept blowing and sucking. OH YES OH YES Henden felt his sperm coming and he said ALBEN I”M GONNA POP!!! Hendern gave Alben sperm in his mouth. Albin laid back and said how about you try it on me Hendern went for Albens penis and gave him great oral and then Alben turned Hendren on to his stomach and started to lick Henderns anal area and Hendren was going crazy and was loving it.

Albin then grabbed some lube and first rubbed some and put some into Hendren rectum and the Albin lubed up his 7 inch penis and said K Hendren I am now going to penetrate you and insert my penis inside of you. Albin started to push in slow and then was in all the way. OHH ALBIN! Hendren moaned. Yes baby relax and enjoy cause I am going to please u good said Albin. OH yes said Hendren your penis feels good in me.

Albin said now I am going to increase the speed and Albin started to thrust faster and faster. OH ALBIN OH YES !!!!!!!!! OH GIVE IT TO ME! PLEASE ME PUT YOUR SPERM IN ME!! A few moments later Albin felt it and said here it comes IM ABOUT TO EJACULATE OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHG!!!!!!!!!! Albin felt his sperm shoot out of his penis and shoot inside of Hendrens rectum. A minute late Albin laid back down on his back and he and Hendren were looking at each other with passion. WOW that was great said Hendren. yes it was said Albin..

The next day they started to date and Hendren moved in with Albin.

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It was my first year of college and I was moving into his new apartment. As I carried my boxes in I saw him, this man unlike I had ever seen before. He wasn’t my normal type, this man was 5’5 probably only 125 pounds but pure muscle. I was taller standing about 5’9 165 pounds, and while I went to the gym six days a week I still wasn’t the jock looking type I was fit but nothing you would look twice at. I set my boxes in my room and went to introduce myself to my new roommate. “Hi I’m Alan,” I said, sticking my hand out. “I’m James,” he said, grabbing my hand to shake.

From the handshake alone I knew I wanted this man grabbing me all over, his firm hand shake and deep voice. I held a bit longer than I probably should have, staring into his beautiful blue eyes filled with yellow specs and green. His short red blonde beard not matching his brown blonde hair. Everything about this man made me want to kiss him. We talk a little nothing too interesting just introductions as we move our stuff in. I couldn’t help but look at him every chance I got, especially at his little bubble butt from years of playing soccer, I think he caught me checking him a couple of times but he didn’t say anything.

I never hid the fact that I liked guys from him, I’m not the super feminie type, so people will often think I am straight, and I like my men that way too. This was James, while he may have been slightly shorter than I like, and not built, his body was the body of potential, if he ever went to the gym he would have the body of a god. Living together was a blast and he quickly became one of my best friends, which made it harder to keep my hands off of him, he liked to be shirtless and definitely wasn’t shy about changing in front of me even though we had our own rooms. Every time he dropped his pants I would look at his thick bulge in his tight american eagle spandex underwear.

We lived together the entire time we were in college, and I always hid my feelings for him, he was straight and very avid about it, as could be seen from my drunken flirting throughout the years. In our third year of college I started to realize that I could hear him jerking off through the wall, an accident at first, but then it became a daily thing. I would hear his bed shake as he stroked his big cock, his balls slap against his hand as he sped up getting closer to orgasm. His breathing would get heavier with every stroke. I could hear him squirm in bed, his legs sliding against his sheets. It turned me on so much to hear him it never took me long to blow my load after he finished. He was always horny it seemed like too, two sometimes three times a day I would press my ear against our shared wall to hear him blow his thick load.

He always left his bedroom door wide open if he wasn’t in his room, in the mornings was my favourite because I could smell the load he just emptied out of his balls. It drove me crazy to smell his ball gravy but I never acted on it, just let my cock ooze precum into my underwear and jerk off when I got a chance.

One day we were sitting in the living room joking around like we always do, I insulted him calling him out for something stupid. “Suck my dick Alan” he says jokingly. “Whip it out bitch” I reply. James isn’t one to back down from anything and while it may have been a joke he sticks his hand down his basketball shorts and pulls out his cock. I’m in a moment of shock as I stare at this man’s beautiful cock, a nice pink tip, cut and delicious looking. My mouth fills with saliva as the episode of whatever we had on plays on the tv in the background. His cock wasn’t the biggest, a good four or five inches soft, and decently thick, his pubes kept trimmed down as he did with all his body hair. I match his gaze, finally pulling my eyes away from his cock. He is laughing and goes to put his cock back in his pants, but before he gets a chance I’m on my knees in front of him reaching for his cock. He stops laughing and just looks at me. “The fuck are you doing” he yell asks? “Sucking your dick, like you told me to” I say, grabbing his cock and lightly stroking it, feeling it grow in my hand. He started to protest saying it was a joke but his words turned to a moan when my mouth wrapped around his head.

His dick quickly grows to full size in my mouth as he moans deeply, one hand on the back of my head grabbing my hair and his other hand grabbing the couch. I come off of his dick and look him in the eyes “do you want me to stop” I ask knowing his answer already. “Fuck no” he says. I grab the sides of his pants and rip them to his ankles, his big full balls falling out and slapping against the leather couch. I stroke his cock while I lick and suck his balls making him moan like he’s never moaned before. I take his now eight inch and fully erect cock down my throat, my nose buried in his pubes and his balls resting on my chin. I can feel his cock pulsing in my throat. I suck his cock deepthroating it for a few more minutes before he says he is going to cum. I pull off his dick he opens his eyes to look at me questioningly. “Not yet” I say.

I don’t want this to end yet I want to savor this. I lightly stroke him not enough to let him cum but enough to keep him close. I play with his balls taking in the taste and smell of this man and savoring every second of it. I stand up and suck on his nipples while I continue to stroke his cock. His moans fill my ears and I have never heard a better sound. I stop stroking his cock and focus on playing with his nipples letting his cock cool down. I drop back to my knees and take just the tip of his cock in my mouth tasting his precum, before taking it back down my throat. “Fuck” he grunts and I know that he is about to cum. I pull back so I can feel and taste his load hit my tongue. He looks down at me as he starts to shoot and our eyes meet, his beautiful eyes looking into mine as rope after rope coats the inside of my mouth. He finishes cumming and I finally decide to swallow his thick delicious load, with his dick still in my mouth. I suck every drop from his cock and keep sucking until it flops out of my mouth. I stand up my cock rock hard pressed against my jeans, I’ve leaked so much precum you can see it. James looks at me then stands up and goes to his room shutting the door, his shorts and underwear still on the floor. I go to my room and drop my pants stroking my cock and blowing my load all over myself the taste of his cum still lingering in my mouth.

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